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  1. rmsh16's Avatar
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      • India

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    #1

    Thanks for participation in Picnic

    Dear Teachers,

    Pl. proofread...............

    Thank you in advance

    Sub: Thanks for participation in picnic - (Is this subject sounds ok ??)

    Dear Members,

    We would like to thank one and all for your active participation and making a very successful / memorable picnic. The resort was really for nature lovers heaven and the beauty which takes your breath away and the verdant green lawn swag the hearts of holiday makers.

    We request same type of support from you all in future too boost up our spirit to organize such events again & again.

    We further inform you that the gifts for all members can be collected from their respective group heads / departments.

    Please note that the picnic photos being uploaded and you can access my computer (user name _______ p/w ________) in the shared folder picnic photos to retract those memories.


    • Join Date: Nov 2007
    • Posts: 5,409
    #2

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    What are you meaning to say by:
    and the verdant green lawn swag the hearts of holiday makers.

  2. rmsh16's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    It is about the description of the resort to tell the members who have not participated in the picnic.


    • Join Date: Nov 2007
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    #4

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    Read my post carefully:
    What are you meaning to say by:
    and the verdant green lawn swag the hearts of holiday makers.


    What is 'swag' supposed to mean, what does this sentence mean?

  3. rmsh16's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    swag - booty of burglars or festoon of flowers, foliage


    • Join Date: Nov 2007
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    #6

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    and the verdant green lawn swag the hearts of holiday makers.

    So - if 'swag' is a noun, where is the verb in the clause beginning 'and'

  4. rmsh16's Avatar
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    #7

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    This note was composed by me and knew that the composed letter is grammatically incorrect. Hence seeking the help of teachers. Pl. proofread and help me out by improving my English.

    I am also feeling that my English is becoming better & better day by day (after registering UsingEnglish.com) and continue to improve in the same line.

    My sincere thanks for all of you to support & teaching the good English to non-native users.
    Last edited by rmsh16; 13-Oct-2008 at 08:13.


    • Join Date: Oct 2006
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    #8

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    Quote Originally Posted by rmsh16 View Post
    Dear Teachers,

    Pl. proofread...............

    Thank you in advance

    Sub: Thanks for participation in picnic - (Is this subject sounds ok ??) Keep it simple: Company picnic

    Dear Members,

    We would like to thank one and all for your active participation and making which made for/which resulted in a very successful / memorable [either will do] picnic. The resort was really a nature lovers' heaven [ok, but "paradise" could be used instead] and the with a beauty which takes your breath away that took away the breath and the verdant green lawn swag the hearts of holiday makers. [Aaagh!] and wonderful verdant lawns that invited the holiday makers to sit on them.

    We hope for the same type of support from you all in future when organising such events to boost our spirits.

    We further inform you that the gifts for all members can be collected from their respective group heads / departments.[whichever is applicable to the person]

    Please note that the picnic photos being are being/will be uploaded and you can access my computer (user name _______ p/w ________) in the shared folder picnic photos to retract those memories.you can access them in the shared folder "Picnic Photos" via my computer: (user name _______ p/w ________).
    ..

  5. rmsh16's Avatar
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    #9

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    Thank you so much dear.
    I bow to your kindness and professionalism and everyone should appreciate your voluntary support.

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    #10

    Re: Thanks for participation in Picnic

    Dear Teachers,

    Sub: Thank you for participating in the picnic (date)

    Dear Members,

    We would like to thank one and all for your active participation in making our picnic successful and memorable. The resort was a nature lover's heaven and its beauty took our breath away, with its verdant green lawn swag that won the hearts of all attendees.

    We request the same level of support from you all in future evetns in order to boost our spirits.

    The gifts can be collected from the members' respective group heads / departments.

    To retract some pleasant memories, please note that the picnic photos are being uploaded and you can access my computer (user name _______ p/w ________) in the shared folder picnic photos.

    (A "lawn swag" is an expansive area of landscape, probably filled with flowers and interesting horticulture)

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