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    • Join Date: Feb 2009
    • Posts: 2

    can you evaluate my essay please

    toefl essay: Many people believe that it is very important to make large amounts of money,while others are satisfied to earn a comfortable living. Analyze each viewpoint and take a stand. give specific reasons for your position.

    Many people who believe making large amount of money ,and people who are satisfied to earn enough money to live comfortable living are two sets of people with two different view to see life.
    People who make large amount of money want to acquire things for their luxuries and comforts.No matter what, this set of people wants to acquire not only quantity but also quality of life with the sum of incoming money.
    Making more money brings more comforts,but in that process people change so many jobs for better pay for making more money,this involves mental tensions,new challenges.With this sometime their health can effect and ultimatly deterioate,for some in this process they have a higher percentage of chances of getting depressed when they don't make as much money as they did in their previous job.
    People believe making large amount of money can have a peaceful retirement,as they have enough resources and bank balances to rely upon.And they can spend for health related issues in old age with the money they earned and backed up.
    In contrast to above,if we see people who make enough money which they think they can have comfortable life are more satisfied with the way their life prospectives are looked into.As they fully satisfied with the pay and the amount of money they are earning for a comfortable life,there are few chances of getting health problems due to depression and other mental illness which are commonly seen in individuals who are in process of procurring a large sum of money.
    I take my stand with people who make comfortable living,as i feel "Health is Wealth",If you are happy mentally you are happy physically.

    • Join Date: Feb 2009
    • Posts: 2

    Re: can you evaluate my essay please

    What recent news story has affected you the most? In what ways has it affected you? Use reasons and examples to support your response

    September 11th 2001 World trade center(WTC) collapse news story incidence affected me the most.
    It effected me in such a way that,i get scared to even see any airplane near a building which i feel like, its going to hit buildings.
    I have seen in all news channels again and again the same incident happening on spetember 11th 2001 and while i was watching the first building collapse, i saw secound one too brought down by one more air plane,that was the darkest day in my life.Seeing the smoke,fire,people distress brought in me ever forgetting sad incident in my memory.I could not stop my tears roll down from my eyes even now while recollecting the incident.I can understand how much pain and suffering people must have been undergone with that disaster.People calling their loved ones about their safety and people searching in rebels for their loved ones and most impartantly heros of nation the fire department, paramedic and police dog's end less efforts remined in me unforgetable sad episode in my heart.
    So,i consider september 11th 2001 World trade center collapse incident was the news story which affected me the most.

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