Results 1 to 3 of 3

    • Join Date: Feb 2009
    • Posts: 6

    can someone plz correct my essay a couple of my friends revised it but i know it need

    Tuck Everlasting
    If you could choose to live forever, would you? Tuck Everlasting is a story about a fifteen-year-old girl called Winnie that meets the Tuck family. While Winnie wondering through her woods she meets Jesse Tuck. After having to talk with Jesse she finds out being kidnapped by Jesses mother (Mae) and father (Angus). Then Winnie founds out the Tuck family has a secret, they are immortal. Tucks had drunk the magical water from a spring that was actually a fountain of youth in Winnieís woods. Winnie falls in love with Jesse his seventeen and asks her to drink the magical water when she turns seventeen to become immortal for them to be together forever. So Winnie by time has to make up her mine about becoming immoral. Also there is a man in a yellow suit following Winnie everywhere she goes and tries to take her against her will. Unfortunate for the man in the yellow suit is killed by Mae Tuck. She is caught and supposes to be executed but she doesnít because sheís immortal and canít die. Winnie saves her. Going to the end of the story Winnie decides to not drink the water and the book jumps to years later Jesse standing by Winnieís grave. This story is hard to believe there is actual magical water, thinking about braking the role of death in the cycle of life, and making someone chose between dieing and living for ever for love.
    First, magical water to make society everlasting the same and not die is impossible. In this story in the woods there is a tree with magical water that makes who ever drinks become immoral. Magical water is more of a fantasy or someoneís really crazy dream. Why would someone do such thing like inventing magical water that gives eternal life? Everyone knows there is no such thing as eternal life because soon or later, one way or another we going to die. There is a point in our life we will die and the magical water being invented will lead to breaking the role of death in the life cycle.
    Living for ever is impossible because once anyone is born they start their cycle of life. Because it is clear to everyone that life has a course with a beginning, middle, and an end. Like in the Tucks situation they are never going to end their cycle of life, making then eternity bored. Also there can be consequences for living for ever. For instance, human body by time will change and body parts would end up losing their function. Meaning that physically the person would look young and look in a great health but inside they would be as the old person they should be and might be death from the inside but not out. But also will cause loneliness because they would see the people that they love and care die over and over. Causing a really huge pain in their heart that would lead them to make that person they love choose to live also for ever.
    In Tuck Everlasting Jesse and Winnie create a strong love, making Jesse ask Winnie to drink the water when she turns seventeen to become immortal for them to be together for ever. Jesse sees how his life is actually doing like having to hide from people, canít hang around with the same friends and just see the people he get to love and care die. Then why would he be proposing to Winnie the girl he loves to suffer and go through the same as he is? He doesnít realize that he wont be giving her that life they should live. If he really loved her he will give her the greatest love and always be who he was when they fall in love. Love her and just be with her until the day she would pass away and be happy for her to be in a better place. thatís ho reality is and thatís how Jesse should think living for ever is just a disaster of bored by time. Because making her chooses to live a well life or become immoral is a harsh decision to make more when being ask by that love one. In a way she is being pressure because she might feel if she donít choose to drink the water he will think that she donít love him. Also that he will leave her and just break her heart. In the other hand, this can result in a decision in which they can see how strong there love is. Like in the end of the story Winnie decides to not drink the water and still they spend all her life together and still he visited her grave.
    A story were it looks at ideas such as loyalty, friendship, making responsible decisions, and dealing with the results of these decisions. While reading there would be some questions going through the reader mind: What would I do if you were Winnie? Do I agree with the Tucks' attitude toward the spring? Do I agree with Winnie's actions? These thoughts lead to asking: Why is there magical water? Why become everlasting the same? Why have to choose between living a normal life or live forever to be with my love one? Magical water is a more fairytale thing there is just no magical water or powder or etc. . . to make people live for ever. Living forever is impossible because every human been will have to go through the role of the life cycle is shorter terms are longer terms. Because we all donít die at a certain time some die unexpected and some have their life timed. For instance, getting in a car crash and dieing is unexpected. And being detected by severe cancer, being told have a month left is life timed death. Most important and painful believe it or not is having to choose between one thing or another for the love of your life. When love someone there shouldnít be such harsh decisions to make as dieing when you have to or live forever and see all your love ones die over and over. Tuck Everlasting a story were readers examine the idea of "forever" according to a fountain of magical water, think about the role of death in the cycle of life and tells how far people could go for love of their life.

    • Join Date: Feb 2009
    • Posts: 5

    Re: can someone plz correct my essay a couple of my friends revised it but i know it

    I am not the best at this and I am only mid way through my ENG 101 class but this is what I see that you might want to look back over.

    Dieing---> should be dyeing

    for ever----> forever

    you have used only "ho" in one place that should be how.

    thats is a starting word in one of your sentences that needs to be Cap.

    I would say: one thing and another not one thing or another.
    I think that is a grammer error .

    Like I said I'm new at this I am just pointing out what I see.
    Other than that I can say that the spelling is correct.

  1. Member
    English Teacher
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • England
      • Current Location:
      • England

    • Join Date: Feb 2009
    • Posts: 172

    Re: can someone plz correct my essay a couple of my friends revised it but i know it

    You need to organise your essay into parragraphs.
    Very important aspect of it

Similar Threads

  1. [Essay] Please correct my essay
    By saobimila999 in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 05-Dec-2008, 21:51
  2. [Essay] Correct my first essay, please.
    By stupidman in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 08-Nov-2008, 16:14
  3. [Essay] Can Anyone Correct My Essay? Thanks so much!
    By biplane in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 01-Nov-2008, 06:54
  4. Would you correct this essay?
    By aleycris in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 18-Oct-2003, 22:05


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts