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    • Join Date: Nov 2007
    • Posts: 5,409
    #1

    check grammar, please

    Can you help me?

    A photographer called John ____ (fly) first class from London to Nairobi in Kenya when one of the co-pilots __________ (come) out of the cockpit to make some coffee in the microwave. He couldn’t make the machine work, so he asked his fellow pilot to help him. As the other pilot _________ (leave) the cockpit, he let the heavy metal door close behind him. The pilot started an urgent, whispered discussion with his colleague. The two pilots __________ (lock) themselves out of their cockpit and as they told the photographer (who promised not to tell the other passengers) the door ___________ (fit) with an anti-terrorist lock. This meant that not even the pilots could open it from outside the cockpit. John remembered that _______ (put) his Swiss army knife in his hand luggage. However, he couldn’t remember where he had put his hand luggage and spent five minutes opening and closing overhead lockers until he found it. John and the pilots __________ (attack) the door with the knife, the lock ___________ (start) to come loose and when they ____ (break) into the cockpit, the plane _____________ (cruise) eastwards over the Indian Ocean.

    Is it right?

    A photographer called John flying (fly) first class from London to Nairobi in Kenya when one of the co-pilots came out (come) out of the cockpit to make some coffee in the microwave. He couldn’t make the machine work, so he asked his fellow pilot to help him. As the other pilot had left (leave) the cockpit, he let the heavy metal door close behind him. The pilot started an urgent, whispered discussion with his colleague. The two pilots have locked (lock) themselves out of their cockpit and as they told the photographer (who promised not to tell the other passengers) the door had been fitted (fit) with an anti-terrorist lock. This meant that not even the pilots could open it from outside the cockpit. John remembered that had put (put) his Swiss army knife in his hand luggage. However, he couldn’t remember where he had put his hand luggage and spent five minutes opening and closing overhead lockers until he found it. John and the pilots have attacked (attack) the door with the knife, the lock had been started (start) to come loose and when they broke (break) into the cockpit, the plane had cruised (cruise) eastwards over the Indian Ocean.

    Is it correct? Or something not?
    A photographer called John flying (fly) first class from London to Nairobi in Kenya when one of the co-pilots came out (come) out of the cockpit to make some coffee in the microwave. He couldn’t make the machine work, so he asked his fellow pilot to help him. As the other pilot had left (leave) the cockpit, he let the heavy metal door close behind him. The pilot started an urgent, whispered discussion with his colleague. The two pilots have locked (lock) themselves out of their cockpit and as they told the photographer (who promised not to tell the other passengers) the door had been fitted (fit) with an anti-terrorist lock. This meant that not even the pilots could open it from outside the cockpit. John remembered that had put (put) his Swiss army knife in his hand luggage. However, he couldn’t remember where he had put his hand luggage and spent five minutes opening and closing overhead lockers until he found it. John and the pilots have attacked (attack) the door with the knife, the lock had been started (start) to come loose and when they broke (break) into the cockpit, the plane had cruised (cruise) eastwards over the Indian Ocean.

    A photographer called John was flying (fly) first class from London to Nairobi, in Kenya, when one of the co-pilots came out (come) out of the cockpit to make some coffee in the microwave. He couldn’t make the machine work, so he asked his fellow pilot to help him. As the other pilot had left (leave) the cockpit, he let the heavy metal door close behind him.(Poor sentence construction with the use of 'as'. OR should it be: As the other pilot was leaving...) The pilot started an urgent, whispered discussion with his colleague. The two pilots had locked (lock) themselves out of their cockpit and, as they told the photographer (who promised not to tell the other passengers), the door had been fitted (fit) with an anti-terrorist lock. This meant that not even the pilots could open it from outside the cockpit. John remembered that had put (put) his Swiss army knife in his hand luggage. However, he couldn’t remember where he had put his hand luggage and spent five minutes opening and closing overhead lockers until he found it. John and the pilots have(omit - use Simple Past) attacked (attack) )the door with the knife, the lock had been(omit) started (start) to come loose, and when they broke (break) into the cockpit, the plane had(omit) cruised (cruise) eastwards over the Indian Ocean. (Bad sentence - it implies that simply because they broke into the cockpit, 'the plane (then) cruised'. Do they mean, when they broke in, the plane 'was cruising'... and do planes 'cruise'?
    Last edited by Anglika; 09-Mar-2009 at 22:20. Reason: repetitive posting on same topic - please do not do this. Wait for an answer.


    • Join Date: Nov 2007
    • Posts: 5,409
    #2

    Re: Exercise

    Perhaps this is your first thread.

    The idea is, you say what you think is the appropriate word, and then others will explain 'why', if you have chosen the wrong form of the word.

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