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      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
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      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Feb 2008
    • Posts: 222
    #1

    help me

    I translated the following introduction from my first language into English>

    I want you to help and correct the mistakes>

    I want to know if it is meaningful or not.

    I dont know if the using of the words is correct or not.

    help me teachers


    Introduction

    Computer lab contains of many important apparatus because of that we need to do a peridoic maintenance and protect them from anyone who wants to abuse them or steal them. So, we will use a very fast and saving of time and effort way.
    This way called (Barcode Technology).
    Our roles and duty as a students in the university and especially in the computer science departement is to serve these labs by making a connection between the barcode technology and the new program which will we programme it as soon as possible. In order to record every pieces in the lab with it's information and record everything happen in the lab such as the maintenance or the replacement of all the pieces or some of them. Also,the person who will do the maintenance ,the time and the date will be recorded. For example, if there is any installation of a new projector ,the program will record that and it,s date of entry.It will record also the person who did that.
    After that we can identify a peridoic period of time to maintain the apparatuns by using the program.Then the appartus will record the person who maintain it. It will tell us about the apparatuns's case if it is okay or broken.
    To make the lab more savety ,the entry and the exist of the faculty members and the students will be recorded.

    Finally,we can print many reports about the current appartus and compare the with appartus that are already installated.
    If there is any malfunction in any appartus ,we can print a notice about it before the maintenance and after it.


    Thanx in advance
    Last edited by Dally; 27-Mar-2009 at 15:50.

  1. Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
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      • English
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      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jan 2009
    • Posts: 3,606
    #2

    Re: help me

    Three things will help your writing a lot:

    - Start sentences with capital letters.
    - Put one space after each period.
    - A space always goes after every comma, never before.

    [I edit copy and have tutored college writing.]

    • Member Info
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    #3

    Re: help me

    Thank u

    But I want to know if it is meaningful or not .


    • Join Date: Oct 2006
    • Posts: 19,434
    #4

    Re: help me

    Quote Originally Posted by Dally View Post
    Thank you

    But I want to know if it is meaningful or not .

    As the lack of spacing and proper capitalisation make it difficult to read, it is hard to judge. Repost with corrections and see what people say.

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Feb 2008
    • Posts: 222
    #5

    Re: help me

    I edited it.

    But please tell me if it is grammatical and meaningful or not.

    This is the most important thing that I want to know.


    • Join Date: Oct 2006
    • Posts: 19,434
    #6

    Re: help me

    Where is the "improved" version?


    • Join Date: Mar 2009
    • Posts: 248
    #7

    Re: help me

    Dally,
    If you send me a copy of it by email, I'll copy-edit it for you.
    <haln@charter.net>
    Hal N.

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