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    • Join Date: Mar 2009
    • Posts: 7

    please edit these paragraphs

    hello everyone,

    I have written a article about a journey to jungle. it is a long article and I m posting here a few paragraphs of that articles. please correct it and suggest me a appropriate words if necessary at any place.

    SundarBan Trip

    At around 3.30 pm, two guys are walking along one of the busiest roads of Sector 5... Their destination is not far away. As usual they are heading towards the tea junction to take their daily dose of 10 Rs tea. They are not talking to each other in fact they are gazing at arbitrary things sometimes building, sometimes dog and most of the times girls. Suddenly an idea fleshes in one of guys head and a guy with an automatic spike hair asked the other guy “will you go to sundarban; we have 3 days off including a republic day.” The other guy nodded.

    Automatic spike hair guy was himanshu. And the one with nodding his head was me. Every plan starts like this. One gives the idea and others follow without hesitation. At least in our case, we have to capitalize on our 3 days off as we are already trying hard to get away of our monotones life. Once a time a great man has said “In a trip, highest level of ecstasy is directly proportional to the no. of people and the closeness among the people. “ We remind these words to ourselves and to achieve the highest level of ecstasy we decided to include others in our plan. Amit, Umesh and Arka are our obvious choice. Amit as usual doesn’t look to be in accord with us but the other two guys were like us, we all have something common. We all are ex-students of IIT Kharagpur, we all are in kolkata, we all are working in same sector 5 area and the most important we all want a break.

    Among us himanshu was a perfect planner sometimes I feel he can be good wedding planner rather than a software engineer. He has already done the calculation of our per head expenses and decided the route. Since 3 days off including republic day bewitch most of the people to spend quality time in some good place and sundarban is one the few rarest places inside west Bengal to relish them. So we have pretty decent idea that we have a very rare chance to make this trip happen. But we were determine to take our chances. Himanshu declared “It is inevitable to spend less than 3000 rs, approximately 4k per head will be the cost”. As soon as Umesh heard this he looks discordantly and in amazement towards us. At that moment we were almost sure umesh is out of our plan. The very next day in the morning, Umesh was suffering from tonsil. Without umesh, this tour couldn’t be possible we needed at least 4 guys to share our expenses. Till evening we changed our plan, trip to sundarban look shattered. We were desperate to get away from kolkata so Digha became our next destination. But if something is designed to happen, sooner or later it will happen. At late night Umesh called back and confirmed his ability to go sundarban. And then very next morning our journey has started.

  1. Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
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      • Native Language:
      • English
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      • United States
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    • Join Date: Jan 2009
    • Posts: 4,378

    Re: please edit these paragraphs

    Automatic spike hair?

    • Join Date: Mar 2009
    • Posts: 7

    Re: please edit these paragraphs

    hi charlie,

    well I used this "automatic spike hair" because that guy once told me that he doesn't have to make spike hair, it become spike by itself..

    anyway .. how is it ? .. is there any fault..

    let me know ..

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