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    #1

    Did I write this essay well?

    Please, can any teacher read and correct this essay? It's really urgent!

    SUICIDE
    Suicide has always been seen in different ways during the course of history and across the history of the European countries. The person that produced suicide used to be seen in a bad way moth of the times in the recent past. In France, for example, the body of the person who had produced the suicide was punished for having done such a terrible thing and it was hanged by feet, dragged through the street on a hurdle, burned and then thrown on the public garbage heap. Going back to the ancient civilized Athens of Plato, the body of the person who had had the shamelessness of taking his life off was buried outside the city and above all away from the other graves, the hands, which were considered the means the person had produced the suicide with, were cut off, thrown away and then buried apart. In England nobles producing the suicide used to loose their property and their castles and we have to underline that this particular English law was not changed until 1870.
    But the bad considerations about the suicide are born in the primitive societies, when it was considered as a frightening stuff and this horror of suicide survived so long in Europe. The terror and the worse consideration about the suicide derives, moreover, from the fact that people were usually used to equating it with murder.
    The word “suicide” is a typical Latin word; but if we studied the very different ways that English language still has to mean the concept we usually think of when we hear this word, we would notice words such as “self-murder”, “self-destruction”, “self-killing”, “self-homicide” and we can see how all these words reflect the association with murder and with the homicide of the self.
    They also reflect the difficulty the Church had in rationalizing its ban on suicide, since neither the Old nor the New Testament directly prohibits it. The four suicides recorded in the Old Testament – Samson, Saul, Abimelech and Achitophel – do not get adverse comment by anyone! Judas Iscariot himself is recorded as blankly. We also must say that the idea of suicide interpreted as a crime came later in the Christian doctrine. Only in the VI century a.D., the Church legislated against the suicide and we ought to add up that the only biblical authority was a special point of view of the sixth commandment: “Thou shalt not kill”. The Fathers of the Church interpretated this commandment according to a weird sense of life: whoever would have killed himself, would have also produced an homicide and would have gone against the God’s commandment. Christianity is founded on the belief that the life of each human being is the gift of God and, rejecting it, would mean to reject God Himself and to frustrate His will as well; moreover, killing His image would certainly mean killing Him and this would have taken the Christian to the eternal damnation.
    In other societies, whose gods were those of violence and whose ideal was bravery, suicide was often looked on as a great good though. For example, the paradise of the Vikings was Valhalla, “the Hall of those who died by violence”, where the Feast of Heroes was presided over by the god Odin. Only those who had died violently could enter and partake of the banquet. The greatest honour and the surest qualification was death in battle; next best was suicide. Those who died peacefully in their beds, of old age or disease, were excluded from Valhalla through all eternity. So suicide is seen as a good thing and, according to some people, Odin himself, the ancient German god, the supreme god of war, wounded himself with his own sword, and then he was ritually burnt. Similarly there was a Druid maxim promoting suicide as a religious principle: “There is another world, and they who kill themselves to accompany their friends thither, will live with them there”. We notice how the suicide was interpretated differently in the German world and in the Latin world: this might have happened because of the influence of the Christian Church above the Latin world.
    If we today stopped ourselves for a moment and if we thought how suicide is usually imagined, we will catch that suicide is an act of choice, a terrible choice, but a choice. The person who thinks this choice is the most correct and the last choice to make, dies by his own hand because he thinks life has not worth living any longer. In the more recent history we have a lot of examples of suicides arisen from the conviction that life had not worth living: we could think of the Spanish Conquest of the New World which represents on of the most deliberate genocide where the treatment of the native inhabitants was so cruel and so bad that many Indians killed themselves rather than keeping on getting massacred.
    In the course of history we can count many famous suicides: Socrates, Codrus, Lycurgus, Cato, Zeno, Seneca and Paulina. Among many others were Greek orators such as Isocrates and Demosthenes; the Roman poets Lucretius, Lucan and Labienus, and the dramatist Terence, the critic Aristarchus and then many important characters of history like Hannibal, Brutus, Cassius, Mark Antony and Cleopatra, Nero, Otho and so on. And there was also Mithridates who, to protect himself from his enemies, had immunized himself by years of swallowing small doses of poison. But we have to point out that the Romans looked on suicide neither with fear nor revulsion, but as a carefully considered and chosen validation of the way they had lived and the principles the had lived by. So there was no revenges, no degradation, no evidence of fear or any sort of horror. Rarely the Romans used to punish the suicide and just when it was looked on as a crime: for instance, it was a crime for a slave to kill himself for the simple reason that he represented to his master a certain capital investment. If he killed himself, or attempted to, within six months of his purchase he could be returned – alive or dead – to his old master and the deal was declared invalid. In the same way, a soldier was considered to be the property of the State and his suicide was tantamount to desertion. Finally, it was also an offence for a criminal to take his own life in order to avoid trial for a crime for which the punishment would be forfeiture of his estate. In this case, a suicide was declared to be without legal heirs. The relatives, however, were allowed to defend the accused as though he were still alive; if he were found innocent, they then retained their inheritance; if not, it went to the State.
    Once Cesare Pavese said that “No one ever lacks a good reason for suicide”. If suicide was once a mortal sin, nowadays it has become a private vice, something shameful to be avoided and tidied away. Suicide is humanly shocking and at the same time it has become a respectable thing because of science and its studies: that is, it has become the subject of intensive scientific research, and science, according to what someone usually says, makes anything respectable. This change began in 1897 with the publication of Emile Durkheim’s classic Suicide: a Study in Sociology. This sub-title made the point unequivocally; the main question was no longer the morality of the act itself but the social conditions which produce such despair. After Durkheim scientific studies about suicide have multiplied since the 1920s on: theories of every colour by psycho-analysts, psychiatrists and clinical psychologists, sociologists and social workers were done. Lately many essays about suicide have been written and many scientists have agreed on the fact that a new science is born: “suicidology”. In order to avoid increasing the numbers of suicides, many centers against suicide have been founded: the most important one is the Suicide Prevention Centres in Los Angeles.
    Sometimes suicide may be connected with problems of love and this is very common between young people above all. We can just think of Romeo and Juliet’s suicide story and in this case we’d be in front of a youthful-idealistic and passionate suicide. Romeo and Juliet, moreover, also embody another popular misconception: that of the suicidal great passion. It seems that those who die for love generally do so by mistake and ill-luck, but this is false. Some people, even between the young people, kill themselves because of unhappy love affairs, and others because of debts or something like this. Some other people are able to kill themselves because of bad weather conditions and, by the way, many scientists point out how many of these suicides all over the world happen during the winter season, and this is obviously ridiculous. Suicide cannot be connected with winter or fall or anything else like this and it is definitely produced by a factor of depression in most of the cases. Nowadays lots of young people kill themselves mostly because of problems of love or because of something linked to love. The scientists explain that there is a large number of suicides between teenagers because they act more impetuously, on the wave of emotion whereas the old are more knowing and really careful.
    According to the most recent statistics the highly industrialized and prosperous countries tend to have comparatively high suicide-rates but meanwhile we must add that these countries have comparatively sophisticated methods of collecting the information on which the statistics will be based and fewer prejudices against who does suicide too.
    A large number of successful and would-be suicides give clear warning of their intentions beforehand and they are often driven to the act because their warnings are ignored or brushed aside or even treated with superficiality. All this causes that terrible act and at a certain point of despair a man will be killing himself in order to show the entire world he had lived in, he was and he is serious. TO BE CONTINUED


    • Join Date: Jul 2006
    • Posts: 2,886
    #2

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    Quote Originally Posted by dilodi83 View Post
    Did I write this essay well?
    No.


    • Join Date: Jul 2006
    • Posts: 2,886
    #3

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    JOKE!
    Tommorrow I will have a shufty at it.

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Italian
      • Home Country:
      • Italy
      • Current Location:
      • Italy

    • Join Date: Aug 2006
    • Posts: 769
    #4

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    Thank you very much! I have to give this essay to my Professor and I'd like to give it without any errors... This is just the first part...I also have got the second part of this essay but I have not post it yet on this site...
    Please help me!!


    • Join Date: Jul 2006
    • Posts: 2,886
    #5

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    SUICIDE
    Suicide has always been seen interpreted in different ways during the course of at different parts of Europe and at different periods of European history history and across the history of the European countries.

    No, I need to reword and reorganize this whole part. Hard as I tried to preserve the most of it, I hit the buffers.

    Short and to the point:
    Attitudes towards suicide has varied with time and place in Europe's history.


    The person that Anyone who produced committed suicide used to be seen regarded in a bad way moth much of the times in the recent past.

    People who killed themselves were usually held in low regard by the public in history.


    In France, for example, the body of the person who had produced the suicide was punished for having done such a terrible thing and it was hanged by feet, dragged through the street on a hurdle, burned and then thrown on the public garbage heap. -- does not sound like monlight and roses


    In France, for example, corpses were hanged by feet, dragged along the street, burnt and finally thrown on the garbage heap.


    Going back to the ancient, civilized Athens of Plato, the body of the person who had had the shamelessness of taking his life off was buried outside the city and above all away from the other graves, the hands, which were considered the means the person had produced the suicide with, were cut off, thrown away and then buried apart.


    In Plato's Athens, self-murderers were burnt outside the city, burried far away from the public cemetery with their sinful hands removed.


    In England nobles producing the suicide used to loose their property and their castles and we have to underline that this particular English law was not changed until 1870.

    In England, sinners were put of their possession, up to as late as 1870.

    But the bad considerations about the suicide are born in the primitive societies, when it was considered as a frightening stuff and this horror of suicide survived so long in Europe. The terror and the worse consideration about the suicide derives, moreover, from the fact that people were usually used to equating it with murder.

    Bad feelings towards homicide in primitive societies owed its long survival to the fact that people had a deep-rooted tendency to equate suicide with homicide.


    The word “suicide” is a typical Latin word; but if we studied the very different ways that English language still has to mean the concept we usually think of when we hear this word, we would notice words such as “self-murder”, “self-destruction”, “self-killing”, “self-homicide” and we can see how all these words reflect the association with murder and with the homicide of the self.


    Etymologically, the word suicide comes from Latin. The English equivalent - self -murder - still bears testimony to their acquired habit of handling suicides in these times.


    They also reflect the difficulty the Church had in rationalizing its ban on suicide, since neither the Old nor the New Testament directly prohibits it.

    Etymology also speaks volume of the Church's struggle to rationalize their disapproval: they would not nail their colours to the mast in the Bible in this question.

    The four suicides recorded in the Old Testament – Samson, Saul, Abimelech and Achitophel's – do not get did not receive adverse comment by anyone! reactions.

    ...did not receive universal condemnation from the Chuch.

    Judas Iscariot himself is recorded as blankly.???

    We also must add that the idea of suicide interpreted as a crime came later in the Christian doctrine. In the VI. century A.D., the Church legislated against the suicide. and we ought to add up that t The only biblical authority there was was special point of view of the sixth commandment: “Thou shalt not kill”. The Fathers of the Church interpreted this commandment according to a weird sense of life: Whoever would have killed himself, would have also produced a(n) homicide and would have gone against the God’s 6th commandment. Christianity is founded on the belief that the life of each human being is the gift of God and, rejecting it, would mean to reject God Himself and to frustrate His will as well; moreover, killing His image would certainly mean killing Him and this would have taken the Christians to the eternal damnation.

    This part was very nicely phrased, really.


    In other societies, whose gods were those of violence and whose ideal was bravery, suicide, was often looked on as a great good though. For example, the paradise of the Vikings was Valhalla, “the Hall of those who died in/by violence”, where the Feast of Heroes was presided over by the god Odin. Only those who had died violently could enter and partake of the banquet. The greatest honour and the surest qualification was death in battle; next best was suicide. Those who died peacefully in their beds, of old age or disease, were excluded from Valhalla through all eternity. So suicide is seen as a good thing and, according to some people, Odin himself, the ancient German god, the supreme god of war, wounded himself with his own sword, and then he was ritually burnt. Similarly there was a Druid maxim promoting suicide as a religious principle: “There is another world, and they who kill themselves to accompany their friends thither, will live with them there”. We notice how the suicide was interpretated differently in the German world and in the Latin world: this might have happened because of the influence of the Christian Church above the Latin world.


    Perfect. Did you copy paste this part from somewhere?



    If we today stopped ourselves for a moment and if we thought how suicide is usually imagined, we will would catch that suicide is an act of choice, a terrible choice, but still a choice. The person
    Those who think this choice is the most correct best and the last choice one to (make) resort to, die by their own hands because they think life was not worth living any longer.


    • Join Date: Jul 2006
    • Posts: 2,886
    #6

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    In the more recent history we have a lot of examples of suicides arisen resulting from the conviction that life had was not worth (worth = adjective) living. We could think of the Spanish Conquest of the New World which saw suicide on one of the largest scale most deliberate genocide, where the treatment of the native inhabitants was so cruel and so bad that many Indians killed themselves rather than keeping on getting massacred facing imminent slaughter.
    In the course of history we can count many famous there happened many suicides: Socrates, Codrus, Lycurgus, Cato, Zeno, Seneca and Paulina's. Among many others were Greek orators such as Isocrates and Demosthenes; the Roman poets Lucretius, Lucan and Labienus, and the dramatist Terence, the critic Aristarchus and then many important characters of history like Hannibal, Brutus, Cassius, Mark Antony and Cleopatra, Nero, Otho and so on. And there was also Mithridates who, to protect himself from his enemies, had immunized himself by years of swallowing small doses of poison. But we have to point out that the Romans looked on suicide neither with fear nor revulsion, but rather as a carefully considered and chosen validation of the way they had lived and of (we need 'of' to recognize the symmetry) the principles the had lived by. So there was no revenges, no degradation, no evidence of fear or any sort of horror. Rarely the Romans used to punish the Seldom though, Romans punished suicide, when it was looked on as judged a crime: for instance, a slave killed himself for the simple reason that he represented to his master a certain capital investment. If he killed himself, or attempted to made an attempt, within six months of his purchase he could be returned – alive or dead – to his old master and the deal was declared invalid. In the same way, a soldier was considered to be the property of the State and his suicide was tantamount to desertion. Finally, it was also an offence for a criminal to take his own life in order to avoid trial for a crime for which the punishment would be forfeiture of his estate. In this case such cases, a suicide was declared to be without legal heirs. The relatives, however, were allowed to defend the accused as though he were still alive; if he were found innocent, they then retained their inheritance; if not, it went to the State.
    Once Cesare Pavese said that “No one ever lacks a good reason for suicide”. If suicide was once a mortal sin, nowadays it has become a private vice, something shameful to be avoided and tidied away. Suicide is humanly shocking and at the same time it has become a respectable thing because of science and its studies: that is, it has become the subject of intensive scientific research, and a science, according to what someone usually says, makes anything respectable. This change began in 1897 with the publication of Emile Durkheim’s classic Suicide: a Study in Sociology. This sub-title made the point unequivocally; the main question was no longer the morality of the act itself but the social conditions which produce such despair. After Durkheim scientific studies about suicide have multiplied since the 1920s on: theories of every colour by psycho-analysts, psychiatrists and clinical psychologists, sociologists and social workers were done. Lately many essays about suicide have been written and many scientists have agreed on the fact that a new science is born: “suicidology”. In order to avoid increasing the numbers of prevent suicides, many centers against suicide have been founded: the most important one is the Suicide Prevention Centres in Los Angeles.


    Sometimes suicide may be connected is related to (may be connected to is okay, but then the tail end of the sentence suffers; that is why I changed phrases) with to (problems of) love and this is very common between among young people, above all. We can just think of Romeo and Juliet’s suicide story and in that case we’d be in front of a youthful, idealistic and passionate suicide. Romeo and Juliet, moreover, also embody another popular misconception: that of the suicidal great passion. It seems that those who die for love generally do so by mistake and ill-luck, but this is false. Some people, even between the young people, kill themselves because of unhappy love affairs, and others because of debts or something like this financial reasons. Some other Yet another group of people are able to kill kill themselves because of bad weather conditions , by the way, many scientists point out how many of these suicides all over the world happen during the winter season,. Of these cases most happen during winter, according to scientists and this is obviously ridiculous. Suicide cannot be connected with winter or fall or anything else like this and it is definitely produced by a factor of depression in most of the cases. Nowadays lots of young people kill themselves mostly because of problems of love or because of something linked to love. The scientists explain that there is a large number of suicides between among teenagers because they act more impetuously, they are more heedless, on the wave of emotion whereas the old are more knowing and really careful. as opposed to the aged who think twice before they act.

    Some of your sentences are so good and some are so poor (this last one).
    Did you write all this essay?


    According to the most recent statistics the highly industrialized and prosperous countries tend to have comparatively high suicide-rates but meanwhile we must add take into account that these countries have comparatively sophisticated methods of for collecting the information on which the statistics will be are based and also have fewer prejudices against who does suicides too.
    A large number of victims and would-be suicides potential self-murderers give clear warnings of their intentions beforehand, but they are often driven to the act because their warnings are ignored or brushed aside or even treated with superficiality. All this causes those terrible acts and at a certain point of despair a man will decide to kill himself in order to show the entire world he had lived in, he was being serious.


    • Join Date: Mar 2008
    • Posts: 47
    #7

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    Hi Sir SVARTNIK,

    Hope you can help me out on this one like you help this guy.

    You see It's time of the year again about our performance evaluation. Anyways, I am a recruitment personnel, below are my answers in each statement of our evaluation. Hopefully you can help me better it.. THanks so much

    1) Accuracy in screening and assessing qualifications of candidates?

    a) made sure to delliver the complete details of the candidates to the approving principal. including their experiences...
    b) meade sure that the qualification of the endorsed canidates will really match the qualifications of the approving principal
    c) endorsed really quailified candidates that could be hired by other principal in a blink of an eye,, they could find work elsewhere
    d) endorsed applicants really exhibit interest but sometimes due to salary consideration the intereset is limited somehow

    2) Facilitation of effective and efficient service delivery resulting to customer satisfaction ?
    ba) right after every request of candidates by our principal, we look as soon as possible for applicants to endorsed resulting to some was hired and fulfilled their needs. sometimes i also feel that after we endorsed the candidates to them they would ask for referrals for the candidate for tthier other requirements because the candidate is has the database because he or she is from that field.
    b) if a candidate has a query, we will attend promtply to them resulting to them viewing our company as someone will attend to their needs thus they incraese their interest to work for us and they will refer friends or candidates from their field of experience to us..resulting to many candidates gathered in our pool.
    c) we have endorsed candidates who was really needed for our seabased and land based needs thus our principals staff present it to their boss for final approval

    3) Formulation of Ideas resulting to business development, revenue generation, cost savings or customer retention
    a) I have proposed to go to some other place outside my place of sourcing to get candidates such. due to that we have gathered quite a large pool of applicants.
    b) reall made relationship to the decision makers of of the industry we should coordinate so our vacancies would be dessinated,, resulting to many applicants starting to show interest in applying to us
    c) we have always pointed out to our applicants and clients that if they join us , the benefits that they would satnd to gain is not only money but far greater than money, we can provide stability and timely alotments, . as a result they thier interest have grown and we obviously retain their interest
    d) we have help the decision makers of the centers who provides us with candidates.. for example we help the owner of the center advertise their companies in schoolls and and work really hard help them make profit.. as a return the owners of the centers really is alos helping us gather candidates that they help us with.
    e) We have sought help from the department heads of schoold to help us in our recruitment. because of our sincerity and pr, we are able to get commitment to them that they will help us or will provide us a pipeline of afresh graduates,,t though it's not yet written balck and white.
    f) we make sure that all the presentations that we made we in a center, we do not only include our seabased requirements but also our landbase resulting to applicants interested to apply for both. we also make sure to include marketing our company and how good it is and how stable it is and how we take care of our employees resulting to them seeing us a really good company

    4) Performance of work within the standards or the Quality Information System and the Information Security System.
    a) we have always maintained to obey our guidlines and not the other way around
    b) we have always challenged ourselves to become a model in our company and adhere to to its principles and policies.
    5) Maintenance of harmonious and professional working relationship with collegues

    a) we always respect our collegues
    b) if i plan to be assertive, i always assume that i might be wrong.. always aking my colleugues of what they think
    c) i alwyas believe in teamwork. Once candidate is in the office and im not around..i always ask favor from my officemate in a respectful manner saying please to attend the candidate so they will feel warm..and then i always thank them for helping me
    d) i always do what is commanded of me by my boss. if i dont like his opinion i air my opinion but if what he wants to be done is his opinion i always go for his opinion
    6) Demonstration of unquestionable of unquestionable integrity and honesty in all dealings with both internal and external customers and partners
    a) I always work a full days job even without boss supervision here in the work place even going the extra mile in doing my job on weekends and doing my job even it's already night
    b) when an applicant ask a question i do not know and assure him ill get back to his questions after taking up with the principal, i always get back to the applicant with the answer
    c) Once a candidate is accepted, im truly happy for the candidate and the principal. i will never ask favor from candidate
    d) once i say in my weekly plan that ill source for candidates with the best of my ability. ireally would go out and hunt every nook and cranny just to get candidates

    Hoping for your help

    Thanks so much
    BOB


    • Join Date: Jul 2006
    • Posts: 2,886
    #8

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    I will come back to you in an hour. Duty calls now.


    • Join Date: Jul 2006
    • Posts: 2,886
    #9

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    1) Accuracy in screening and assessing qualifications of candidates?

    a) made sure to submit the credentials of the candidates to the approving principal
    b) made sure that the qualifications of the endorsed canidates will match the qualifications of the approving principal
    c) I could not make out your point here
    d) endorsed applicants evince limited interest due to insufficient remuneration

    I will update this message later with the further points.


    • Join Date: Mar 2008
    • Posts: 47
    #10

    Re: Did I write this essay well?

    Thanks Sir.

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