Results 1 to 3 of 3

    • Join Date: Mar 2009
    • Posts: 21

    Please check and make changes

    With the revolution of supermarket produce spilling over and out onto the sidewalk, in lieu of the anonymity of the supermarket produce aisle, many New Yorkers can talk to the farmers who grow their food. Successful farmersí markets can only bring more or at least expanded offerings on different days at different times where you could find the odd and the autochthonous. The idea worked brilliantly and New Yorkers embraced it with joy. Now the students of Borough Manhattan Community College donít only have education to stimulate their growth, but they have local produce vendors and farmers that will provide them with optimal nourishing needs. Directly parallel to the school are stands selling smoky summer sausage, real iron-kettle-cooked apple butter, chow-chow (a medley of pickled vegetables), fresh-caught local fish, baked goods, used clothing and antiques, hand-crafted goods, and you name it. Each vendor has their specialties that are virtually impossible to find elsewhere.

  1. blueladysw's Avatar

    • Join Date: Nov 2008
    • Posts: 5

    Re: Please check and make changes

    dear andie,

    you have to entitle the passage to specify the field you are talking about more in the mind of the reader.
    indentation is important. misplacing coma as there should be no coma before 'in lieu of' and a coma after 'now' and also what is the meaning of 'autocthoncus'? you should keep consistent time-happening events. 'supermarket products' not 'supermarket produce' as well as' product vendors'. your passage should contain more specific words other than the long clauses of 'that'

    • Join Date: Mar 2009
    • Posts: 21

    Re: Please check and make changes

    Thank you blueladysw!

Similar Threads

  1. Please check and make corrections ;)
    By kasiajez in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 10-Mar-2009, 00:13
  2. Could you, please, check if I make sense
    By changeling in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 09-Aug-2008, 18:19
  3. Replies: 1
    Last Post: 10-Feb-2007, 03:21
  4. Replies: 3
    Last Post: 09-Dec-2004, 02:06


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts