A Real Debate between a Child and an Adult

[Ayed]

Naser is a pious headmaster stopped at and got into a Musjid in Riyadh to do Dhuhur”noon” prayer.
Naser narrates:”Before we started doing Dhuhur prayer, I had been doing two rak’a”kneeling down”called”Musjid greeting” while a prayer next to me smelling rotten tobacco. When I finished the two rak’a,I looked at him and he was an Egyptian with black lips due to smoking.I was about to advise him to give up smoking.However, I decided to postpone my advice until we get out of the Musjid.At the same time , I spotted a 9 year-old son closer to the Egyptian and between them took place the following debate:

The child: “Peace be upon you, my uncle!Are you from Egypt?

The man:”Yes, I am”

The child:”Have you known , the scholar, Sheikh Abdulhameed Kishk?

The man:”Yes, I have”

The child:”And you have known , the scholar, Sheikh Jad Al-haqq?

The man:”Of course”

The child:”And you have known , the scholar , Sheikh Mohammad Al-Ghazali?

The man:”Sure!Yes! I have known him?

The child:”Do you listen to their sermon cassettes and their Fatwa”advisory opinions”?

The man:”Yes! I do”

The child:”If all these scholars”Sheikh” state that smoking is forbidden , then why do you smoke cigarette?
The man:”Somking is not forbidden”and got embarrassed.

The child:”Verily!It is forbidden!Allah , the Almighty, the Exalted says about Muhammad in the holy Quran:” he(Muhammad)prohibits them as unlawful Al-Khabâ'ith--all evil and unlawful as regards things, deeds, beliefs, persons, foods”(7:157)
And the child added:”Do you say”in the name of Allah”at the beginning of smoking ?Or”praise be to Allah” at the end of smoking?

The man:”Recite just a Quranic verse says:”he prohibits them smoking cigarette” stubbornly replied.

The child:”O!Uncle, smoking cigarette is prohibited and so is apple fruit !

The man:”Apple fruit is prohibited!!!You are not scholar to allow or prohibit such things?Angerily replied

The child:”Recite just a Quranic verse says:”he allows them apple fruit” 8)

Naser the headmaster says:
At length, the man got puzzled and silent.He burst into tears and prayed while he weeping .After finishing Dhuhur prayer, the man looked at the child and said:”Listen my son!I swear in Allah that I will not smoke from now on forever.

 

[RonBee]

Naser is a pious headmaster stopped at and got into a Musjid in Riyadh to do Dhuhur”noon” prayer.

You don't need the "got into" there. Perhaps:

• Naser is a pious headmaster who stopped at a musjid in Riyadh to do Dhuhur "noon" prayer.

Or:

• Naser is a pious headmaster who went into a musjid in Riyadh to do Dhuhur "noon" prayer.

Which do you think is better?

 

[Ayed]

the second one

 

[RonBee]

Naser narrates:”Before we started doing Dhuhur prayer, I had been doing two rak’a”kneeling down”called”Musjid greeting” while a prayer next to me smelling rotten tobacco.

That one needs some revision. How about:

• Naser narrates:”Before we started doing Dhuhur prayer, I had been doing two rak’a”kneeling down”called”Musjid greeting” when I noticed that a worshipper next to me stank of rotten tobacco.

While "prayer" in that sentence isn't exactly wrong, I think it could be a little disconcerting to someone who is used to "prayer" meaning the act of worship and not the person doing it. Also, you could use "smelled" instead of "stank", but I think "stank" is probably more accurate.

What do you think?

 

[RonBee]

When I finished the two rak’a,I looked at him and he was an Egyptian with black lips due to smoking.I was about to advise him to give up smoking.

For the first sentence, try:

• After I finished the two rak’a, I looked at him and noticed that he was an Egyptian with black lips due to smoking.

Or:

• After I finished the two rak’a, I looked at him and saw that he was an Egyptian with black lips due to smoking.

I think "When" might be okay, but I think "After" is better.

Space after commas and periods (and not before either).

You could rephrase that as "lips black due to smoking".

However, I decided to postpone my advice until we get out of the Musjid.

Use "got" instead of "get". (It's past tense.)

 

[RonBee]

You can only use "son" for "male child" in relation to the mother or father. Example: "Michael is Ronald's son."

Be sure to space after all terminal punctuation (periods, exclamation marks, and question marks), and also space after such things as commas, colons, and semicolons.

At the same time , I spotted a 9 year-old son closer to the Egyptian and between them took place the following debate:

The child: “Peace be upon you, my uncle!Are you from Egypt?

The man:”Yes, I am”

The child:”Have you known , the scholar, Sheikh Abdulhameed Kishk?

The man:”Yes, I have”

The child:”And you have known , the scholar, Sheikh Jad Al-haqq?

The man:”Of course”

The child:”And you have known , the scholar , Sheikh Mohammad Al-Ghazali?

The man:”Sure!Yes! I have known him?

The child:”Do you listen to their sermon cassettes and their Fatwa”advisory opinions”?

The man:”Yes! I do”

The child:”If all these scholars”Sheikh” state that smoking is forbidden , then why do you smoke cigarette?
The man:”Somking is not forbidden”and got embarrassed.

The child:”Verily!It is forbidden!Allah , the Almighty, the Exalted says about Muhammad in the holy Quran:” he(Muhammad)prohibits them as unlawful Al-Khabâ'ith--all evil and unlawful as regards things, deeds, beliefs, persons, foods”(7:157)
And the child added:”Do you say”in the name of Allah”at the beginning of smoking ?Or”praise be to Allah” at the end of smoking?

The man:”Recite just a Quranic verse says:”he prohibits them smoking cigarette” stubbornly replied.

The child:”O!Uncle, smoking cigarette is prohibited and so is apple fruit !

The man:”Apple fruit is prohibited!!!You are not scholar to allow or prohibit such things?Angerily replied

The child:”Recite just a Quranic verse says:”he allows them apple fruit” 8)

In such a format, put the dialogue tags in parentheses after the name. Thus:

• At the same time, I spotted a 9 year-old boy closer to the Egyptian, and between them took place the following debate:
  
  The child: Peace be upon you, my uncle! Are you from Egypt?
  The man: Yes, I am.
  The child: Have you known the scholar, Sheikh Abdulhameed Kishk?
  The man: Yes, I have.
  The child: And you have known the scholar, Sheikh Jad Al-haqq?
  The man: Of course.
  The child: And you have known the scholar, Sheikh Mohammad Al-Ghazali?
  The man: Sure! Yes! I have known him.
  The child: Do you listen to their sermon cassettes and their Fatwa "advisory opinions”?
  The man:”Yes! I do”
  The child: If all these scholars ”Sheikh” state that smoking is forbidden , then why do you smoke cigarettes?
  The man (embarrassed): Somking is not forbidden.
  The child: Verily! It is forbidden! Allah, the Almighty, the Exalted says about Muhammad in the holy Quran: "he(Muhammad)prohibits them as unlawful Al-Khabâ'ith--all evil and unlawful as regards things, deeds, beliefs, persons, foods”(7:157)
  And the child added:”Do you say”in the name of Allah”at the beginning of smoking ?Or”praise be to Allah” at the end of smoking?
  The man (stubborn): Recite a Quranic verse says he prohibits cigarette smoking.
  The child: O! Uncle, smoking cigarettes is prohibited and so is apple fruit!
  The man (angry): Apple fruit is prohibited!!! You are not a scholar to allow or prohibit such things.
  The child: Recite a Quranic verse says:”he allows them apple fruit” 8)

Shouldn't that be that Muhammad says that Allah "prohibits them as unlawful...."?

Naser the headmaster says:
At length, the man got puzzled and silent.He burst into tears and prayed while he weeping .After finishing Dhuhur prayer, the man looked at the child and said:”Listen my son!I swear in Allah that I will not smoke from now on forever.

Try:

• At length, the man got puzzled and became silent. He burst into tears and prayed and wept. After finishing Dhuhur prayer, the man looked at the child and said: "Listen my son!I swear in Allah that I will not smoke from now on forever."

What do you think? (I hope I didn't mess it up too much.)

 

[Ayed]

Much thanked are you . Mr.RonBee.

Not only "Thumb up" but also"Arms up" 8)

 

[RonBee]