[Grammar] After saying those words

[Nikitus]

Hello.

Are the following sentences grammatically correct?

"After saying those words the hobo took his backpack and left before the atonic look of his friernd."

 

[emsr2d2]

And remember to add a comma after "those words".

 

[Nikitus]

Dear Piscean and emrs2d2:

First of all, thanks for your help.

Here are the corrections:


"After saying those words, the hobo took his backpack and went away. His friend was surprised at what he heard."

Thanks.

 

[Tarheel]

Dear Piscean and emrs2d2:

Thanks for your help.

Here is the revision.


"After saying those words, the hobo took his backpack and went away. His friend was surprised at what he heard."

You don't need "First" if there is no second.

 

[Tarheel]

Consider:

After saying those words, the hobo picked up his backpack and left.

Or:

After saying those words, the hobo put on his backpack and left.