Being Modest and Foolish ?

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flowerseed

Junior Member
Joined
Feb 18, 2008
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
Dear native speaker teachers, please take a look at what I wrote below and make comments on my wording and grammar. Thank you in advance!

I had an unpleasant experience this morning. My colleagues were discussing some questions in front of me. As usual, I showed my interest in the questions they were arguing over, and was about to offer my opinions when they stopped their discussion and it seemed to me that they wouldn't even give me a chance to voice my opinion. Such things happen to me every now and then these days, which annoys me a lot. On my way home, I couldn't help thinking about the reason why they'd behaved that way.

I had many discussions with my colleagues before and in most cases, I was able to prove my points and made them agree with me in the end because I was better informed than most of them. I have read many books in many different subjects at the time when others are watching TV or doing window shopping, which enables me to make a wiser judgement in many cases than those who are less informed. The fact that I always hold an upper hand in the arguments seems to upset my colleagues very much and they are now reluctant to argue anything with me. As it turns out, I have become the unwelcome figure in my office, being left alone most of the time.

When I was younger, my parents, like any parent in our culture, told me to be careful about my wording when arguing with people. Always be modest and patient, they told me, never appear too aggressive even if you think you hold the truth. So whenever I am discussing somthing with people, I try to make myself calm and use words that are reasonable and friendly. Still, because I am always correct in the arguments I become the sore in people's eyes. So people dislike you not because you are aggressive but because you frustrate them by being too reasonable and organized. If you play a trick on yourself and occasionally appear foolish before others, it is more likely for them to take you as their equal and build up friendship with you. Being an honest person, though never hurting people in any forms except appearing wiser in making judgments, I am helplessly turned down by other people who are equally honest to their true feelings.

I didn't write the above to complain. I just wanted to put into words what was in my mind when kept from a discussion by my colleagues. Is their anyone here who has had the similar experience ?
 
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Anglika

No Longer With Us
Joined
Oct 19, 2006
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Other
Dear native speaker teachers, please take a look at what I wrote below and make comments on my wording and grammar. Thank you in advance!

I had an unpleasant experience this morning. My colleagues were discussing some questions in front of me. As usual, I showed my interest in the questions they were arguing over, and was about to offer my opinions when they stopped their discussion and it seemed to me that they wouldn't even give me a chance to voice my opinion. Such things happen to me every now and then these days, which annoys me a lot. On my way home, I couldn't help thinking about the reason why they'd behaved that way.

I had many discussions with my colleagues before and in most cases, I was able to prove my points and made them agree with me in the end because I was better informed than most of them. I have read many books in many different subjects at the time when others are watching TV or doing window shopping, which enables me to make a wiser judgement in many cases than those who are less informed. The fact that I always hold an upper hand in the arguments seems to upset my colleagues very much and they are now reluctant to argue anything with me. As it turns out, I have become the unwelcome figure in my office, being left alone most of the time.

When I was younger, my parents, like any parent in our culture, told me to be careful about my wording when arguing with people. Always be modest and patient, they told me, never appear too aggressive even if you think you hold the truth. So whenever I am discussing something with people, I try to make myself calm and use words that are reasonable and friendly. Still, because I am always correct in the arguments I become the sore [an irritation/ a pain] in people's eyes. So people dislike you not because you are aggressive but because you frustrate them by being too reasonable and organized. If you play a trick on yourself and occasionally appear foolish before others, it is more likely for them to take you as their equal and build up friendship with you. [You have suddenly changed from first person to impersonal "you"- there needs to be a reason for the change: "I think this happens because..." or something similar] Being an honest person, though never hurting people in any forms except appearing wiser in making judgments, I am helplessly turned down by other people who are equally honest to their true feelings.

I didn't write the above to complain. I just wanted to put into words what was in my mind when kept from a discussion by my colleagues. Is their anyone here who has had the similar experience ?

"Wiser" is perhaps not a good word. From the content, it is clear that other people do not regard the arguments as "wiser".
 

flowerseed

Junior Member
Joined
Feb 18, 2008
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
A revised version of the previous writing with the help of respectable moderator Anglika.

I had an unpleasant experience this morning. My colleagues were discussing some questions in front of me. As usual, I showed my interest in the questions they were arguing over, and was about to offer my opinions when they stopped their discussion and it seemed to me that they wouldn't even give me a chance to voice my opinion. Such things happen to me every now and then these days, which annoys me a lot. On my way home, I couldn't help thinking about the reason why they'd behaved that way.

I had many discussions with my colleagues before and in most cases, I was able to prove my points and made them agree with me in the end because I was better informed than most of them. I have read many books in many different subjects at the time when others are watching TV or doing window shopping, which enables me to outshine others in many arguments . The fact that I always hold an upper hand in the arguments seems to upset my colleagues very much and they are now reluctant to argue anything with me. As it turns out, I have become the unwelcome figure in my office, being left alone most of the time.

When I was younger, my parents, like any parent in our culture, told me to be careful about my wording when arguing with people. Always be modest and patient, they told me, never appear too aggressive even if you think you hold the truth. So whenever I am discussing something with people, I try to make myself calm and use words that are reasonable and friendly. Still, because I am always correct in the arguments I become a pain in people's eyes. So it seems to me that people dislike me not because I am aggressive but because I frustrate them by being too reasonable and organized. I wonder what would happen if I played a trick on myself and occasionally appeared foolish before others. It may be more likely for them to take me as their equal and build up friendship with me . However,as an honest person, though never hurting people in any forms except appearing different in making judgments, I am helplessly turned down by other people who are equally honest to their true feelings.

I didn't write the above to complain. I just wanted to put into words what was in my mind when kept from a discussion by my colleagues. Is there anyone here who has had the similar experience ?
 
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