[General] boot camp

contiluo

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Apr 12, 2010
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English Teacher
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Chinese
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Taiwan
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Please help me make the paragraph below sound natural. Thanks a lot.

Last Friday, Ted just came back home from completing a twelve-day new recruits training at Cheng-Kung-Ling boot camp in Taichung. This morning, he assumed his new office at the headquarter of XXX Company in Hsinchu. We are so happy for his new job and sure that he will be an invaluable contributor at XXX Company. We hope that he find the job rewarding and satisfying.
 

Tdol

Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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new recruits training- how about training course for new recruits?
 

emsr2d2

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I'd remove "just" in the opening sentence. It doesn't really go with "Last Friday".
I'd say "We're really happy about his new job" or "We're really happy for him".
I'm not keen on "He assumed his new office".
 

nigele2

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May 3, 2017
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Please help me make the paragraph below sound natural. Thanks a lot.

Last Friday[STRIKE], [/STRIKE]Ted [STRIKE]just [/STRIKE]came back home [STRIKE]from [/STRIKE] after completing a twelve-day new recruits training course at Cheng-Kung-Ling boot camp in Taichung. This morning[STRIKE],[/STRIKE] he assumed his new [STRIKE]office [/STRIKE] role at the headquarters of XXX Company in Hsinchu. We are so happy for [STRIKE]his new job[/STRIKE] him and are sure that he will be an invaluable contributor at XXX Company. We hope that he finds [STRIKE]the [/STRIKE] his [STRIKE]job [/STRIKE] new [STRIKE]role [/STRIKE] responsibilities rewarding and satisfying.

Seems a bit comma heavy to me. I'm not certain that I like "he assumed his new office at" ***. I might find more natural: "he began his new position" or "he started his new position" or even "he assumed his new position".

Of course the military have their own language and I suspect that varies between cultures. But would "posting" be appropriate instead of job? Just my thoughts.

*** Just seen that emsr2d2 mentioned this above.
 
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