Brief Encounters

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Bassim

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This is a little exercise in style. I just let my mind wander around and put my thoughts in the words on the screen, a kind of meditation.

The other day I took a stroll in the city centre. It was a beautiful and sunny day, although we have still winter. It was Saturday and usually I avoid to be in the centre on Saturdays because all the hustle and bustle makes me feel depressive. Thousands of merry students and other youth, ordinary people, lovers, tourists and pensioners; they all have a goal that brings them here, but me. I feel like an outsider. I do not belong to this place and I am well aware I am never going to be part of this world. I watch them like a film on a screen and I will never go over to the other side and become one of them. If the terrible war did not happen in my home land I would never have ended up in this cold place where real love and feelings are such a rare phenomena. My body is here but my thoughts are far away. Our brain must posses a defence mechanism that protects it from the the environment which is damaging.

Unfortunately, not everyone has the ability to adapt himself to the new circumstances. There are those who do not care what happened in the past or where they live now; they just continue as if nothing had happened and push themselves forward using all means to succeed.

And there is another group who put feelings in the first place. They cannot simply do things without asking themselves all the time about their feelings.
They cannot pretend and put a mask or laugh when they are suffering. This group is more vulnerable and easier to hurt. When they suffer their whole being is like a big open wound that will not heal.

Just when I went by a coffee bar I noticed a young couple in their twenties sitting by the window. The girl was crying. Tears ran down her pale cheeks. Opposite her was a man with short brown hair, he was holding girls hands in his owns, rubbing her fingers in a gesture of comfort. But his face was firm. He was a person who probably seldom cries and can take control over his feelings. I stopped for a few seconds pretending I was searching for something in my pockets, trying to memories every smallest detail of this image. Although, there was a thick glass window between them and me I could feel the girl's suffering. Maybe this was their last meeting. There were two empty cups and some sugar wrappers, physical witnesses of their empty relationship.

I imagine that girl tells him in her plaintive, strangulated voice,
"How do you dare? After three years! Three years of my life!"

He does not dare to look at her and answers, his eyes sweeping the interior of the room,
"I think you have to know the truth. I don't want to lie to you. I love HER."

The girl understands he is slowly disappearing from her life and tries the last chance,
"Don't you have a bad consciousness? I will need years until I recover from this. You just played with my feelings. What is wrong with me?"

However, as the man belongs to the first group he will simply leave the room and probably the same day meet his new love pretending everything was O.K.

Since I came to Sweden I have seen that suffering is the universal human condition. As if God himself has damned people of the Earth with pain and laughs at us whenever we think we are happy and satisfied. In Africa they are hungry and poor, in the West they have money and material things, but still psychologists are in a great demand. But it is pain and suffering that give us energy and commitment to continue in this everlasting discovery of the mysteries of the Universe. They remind us how fragile as well strong we are.
 
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RonBee

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Re: Please proofread this text

The other day I took a stroll in the city centre. It was a beautiful and sunny day, although we have still winter. It was Saturday and usually I avoid to be in the centre on Saturdays because all the hustle and bustle makes me feel depressive. Thousands of merry students and other youth, ordinary people, lovers, tourists and pensioners; they all have a goal that brings them here, but me. I feel like an outsider. I do not belong to this place and I am well aware I am never going to be part of this world.
The other day I took a stroll in the city centre. It was a beautiful and sunny day although it is still winter. It was Saturday, and I usually avoid being in the city centre on Saturdays because all the hustle and bustle makes me feel depressed. Thousands of merry students and other youth, ordinary people, lovers, tourists and pensioners all have goals that bring them here, but I feel like an outsider. I do not belong to this place, and I am well aware I am never going to be part of this world.
:)
 

RonBee

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Re: Please proofread this text

I watch them like a film on a screen and I will never go over to the other side and become one of them. If the terrible war did not happen in my home land I would never have ended up in this cold place where real love and feelings are such a rare phenomena. My body is here but my thoughts are far away. Our brain must posses a defence mechanism that protects it from the the environment which is damaging.
I watch them like a film on a screen, and I will never go over to the other side and become one of them. If the terrible war had not happened in my homeland I would never have ended up in this cold place where real love and feelings are such a rare phenomenon. My body is here but my thoughts are far away. The brain must possess a defence mechanism that protects it from an environment which is damaging.
What title would you give this piece?

~R
 

Bassim

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Re: Please proofread this text

RonBee

Thank you very much for helping me. I really appreciate your time and your help.
I have not thought of a title but now when you mentioned it I can call it "Brief encounters."

You probably do not know that in the Swedish capital Stockholm about 50% of the inhabitants live alone and I have always wondered how many of relations are so short-lived in this country. Sometimes, I ask myself is it easier to separate then to say "Hello" to someone in this place.
And what is the cause? The world's highest taxes, cold winters without sun, the lack of social contacts between people ?
I have to write about these problems one day.
 

RonBee

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Unfortunately, not everyone has the ability to adapt himself to the new circumstances. There are those who do not care what happened in the past or where they live now; they just continue as if nothing had happened and push themselves forward using all means to succeed.
The first part of that paragraph does not go with the second part. First, you say that not everyone has the ability to adapt to new circumstances. Then you talk about those who do have that ability.
 

beascarpetta

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Yet there is another group of people- those who always put their feelings first.They simply refuse to do things without asking themselves about their feelings first.
They cannot pretend otherwise or put on a mask or laugh while they suffer. This group is even more vulnerable and hurt more easily. When they suffer their whole being is like a big open wound that will not scab.

Just when I was walking by a coffee bar I noticed a young couple in their twenties sitting by the window. The girl was crying. Tears were running down her pale cheeks. Opposite her there was a man with short brown hair, holding the girl's hands in his own, rubbing her fingers in a gesture of comfort.

But his face was grim. He was a person who probably seldom cries and is in control of his feelings at all times. I stopped for a few seconds pretending I was searching for something in my pockets, trying to memorize every small (even the smallest) detail of the picture they presented.
Although there was a thick glass window between them and myself I could still feel the girl's suffering. Maybe this was their last meeting. There were two empty cups and some sugar wrappers (sitting on the table), bearing witness to their empty relationship.

:-D
 
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RonBee

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And there is another group who put feelings in the first place.
And there is another group which puts their feelings first.
They cannot pretend and put a mask or laugh when they are suffering.
They cannot put on a mask when they are suffering.
This group is more vulnerable and easier to hurt.
This group is more vulnerable and quicker to be hurt.
 
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