form and meaning of 'afford somebody to be'

JACEK1

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Hello.

I would like to ask you a question that has been occupying my head for a while now.

I know for sure that there is a structure, for instance, "to be able to afford to do something" or "to be able to afford something".

I cannot afford to buy this expensive red car. = I don't have anough money to buy it.

The structure that I want to ask you about is as follows (underlined):

I’ve been thinking that I can’t afford for my wife to be a Stay-At-Home Mom.

Does it mean that "I am not able to raise enough money to pay my wife for being a Stay-At-Home wife and many services she does at home" or "I cannot afford a situation in which my wife would spend all her life at home devoting it to a family"?

I think "I can’t afford for my wife to be a Stay-At-Home Mom" is the same as "I can’t afford my wife to be a Stay-At-Home Mom".

I don't think that removing "for" changes the meaning.

What do you think?

Thank you.

Source: http://ijr.com/2015/04/287991-fathers-cant-afford-stay-home-mom/
 

andrewg927

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It means my income is not enough and I need my wife to work.
 

probus

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I don't think that the removal or addition of "for" changes the meaning. But I do think that "for" is AmE only, and a little substandard, slightly less educated-sounding.
 

andrewg927

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It's common enough so I don't think people think of it as substandard, at least in the US.
 

emsr2d2

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I find the capitalisation of "Stay-At-Home" very odd.
 

JACEK1

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afford someone to be vs afford for someone to be vs afford someone being

Hello everybody!

And this is exactly why I can’t afford my wife being a Stay-At-Home Mom.

In my opinion, I can’t afford my wife being a stay-at-home mom = I can’t afford my wife to be a stay-at-home mom = I can’t afford for my wife to be a stay-at-home mom.

Do you think I am wrong?

Thank you.
 

teechar

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And this is exactly why I can’t afford for my wife to be a stay-at-home mom.
That is the one I would use. I don't much like the other two.
By the way, AmE uses "mom"; other varieties use "mum."
 

emsr2d2

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By the way, AmE uses "mom"; other varieties use "mum."

Certain dialects in BrE don't use "mum". My friends from certain parts of the Midlands use "mom" and my Irish friend uses "mam".
 
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teechar

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And you'll also hear "ma".
 
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