Gina married a wealthy man

[Bassim]

I am wondering if my sentences are grammatically correct.

Gina married a wealthy man who was madly jealous. He followed her everywhere, and if she went alone for a visit to her friends, he would call her a couple of times. She felt as if she lived in a gilded cage.

 

[emsr2d2]

I am wondering if my sentences are grammatically correct.

Gina married a wealthy man who was madly jealous. He followed her everywhere (no comma here) and if she went alone [STRIKE]for a[/STRIKE] to visit [STRIKE]to[/STRIKE] her friends, he would call her a couple of times. She felt as if she lived in a gilded cage.

See above. I don't like the use of "madly"; it just doesn't fit with the tone. I'd use "very", "extremely" or "incredibly". I'd probably say he called her "at least a couple of times" unless he always called her twice.