Humorous verse

[RonBee]

Run!

If on my pizza I get one extra topping,
I run to the bathroom without stopping.

:lol:

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Post your own humorous verse(s) here. Have fun!

 

[RonBee]

Remote Remote

Sadly, I have lost the remote control to the teevee.
Where oh where oh where oh where could it be?

It is a puzzlement! I do not understand
How I can lose something that is a part of my hand.


:wink:


6/6/2003

 

[RonBee]

Teacher, Teacher!

I tried to teach him history,
But it was just a mystery.
I tried to teach him reading and writing,
But it wasn't very exciting.
I tried to teach him math,
But he isn't a very smart cat.




4/7/1999

:wink:

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[RonBee]

The BOY FRoM MARS

I know you've seen stars,
And I know you've seen cars,
But have you ever ever ever
Met a boy from Mars?

He's a nightmare,
And he doesn't care,
And he'll make you cry,
Tho I don't know why.

I know you've seen stars,
And I know you've seen cars,
But have you ever ever ever
Met a boy from Mars?

Because of his behavior
You'll look for a savior.
You'll look everywhere inside
For a place to hide.

I know you've seen stars,
And I know you've seen cars,
But have you ever ever ever
Met a boy from Mars?

Be you ever so brave
It's peace and quiet you'll crave,
And you'll scream and shout,
"Get out! Get out!"

I know you've seen stars,
And I know you've seen cars,
But have you ever ever ever
Met a boy from Mars?

With an expression ever so grave,
You'll say, "Why don't you just behave!
You're the most bothersome of boys,
Making way too much noise!"

I know you've seen stars,
And I know you've seen cars,
But have you ever ever ever
Met a boy from Mars?



:wink:



4/15/99 ronbee
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[RonBee]

Some Musings

How come nobody ever has a good cold?
How come you never hear about a baby that is old?
How come you never hear about quiet laughter?
(When you read this will you know what I'm after?)
Will somebody tell me how I can "share" a thought?
Can such a thing be either sold or bought?
Does a preteacher teach at a preschool?
And can you dive into a secretarial pool?
Isn't it wonderful that something can be both improved and new?
(Something for you to think about instead of wondering why the
sky is blue.)
Finally, I want you to know that I am NOT asleep.
(Now, isn't that something really deep?)








1990

:wink:

 

[RonBee]

Andy Is A Teddy Bear

Andy is a teddy bear.
Melanie takes him with her
Wherever she goes.
He has two feet,
But he doesn't have any toes.
Andy is a teddy bear.
One ear is missing.
And what happened to his nose?
And is a teddy bear.
He is brown and tan
And he never wears any clothes.






1/5/99

 

[RonBee]

Sexual Inequality

I say that it’s infair
That only the women give birth.
(It contributes greatly
To their girth.)
I say that the men
Who really truly care
Will take the time to do it—
Yes, they’ll gladly share.


2003-06-21

:wink:

 

[RonBee]

Congressmen

Congressmen are people
Who are smart and respected,
But they become stupid
As soon as they are elected.


:wink:

1990

:wink:

 

[Tdol]

Congressmen are people
Who are smart and respected,
But they become wealthy
As soon as they are elected.

;-)

 

[RonBee]

Would a new gnu
Be a gnu that was new?
Would it be a gnu
Almost nobody knew?

:wink:

 

[RonBee]

A Silly Rhyme ;-)

Food is something
That I don't like to waste,
So I eat it
And it goes to my waist.


4/2/99

:wink:

 

[RonBee]

I'm sorry you saw me stare
At you standing on that stair,
But you were bare on that stair,
And when you're bare I stare.

:wink:

 

[RonBee]

Tutoring Session In Progress

Now, be quiet! Be quiet, if you please!
I'm trying to teach my cat her ABC's.
Now, please! Please don't bother me.
I'm trying to teach her how to count to three.
Now, behave yourself! For shame! For shame!
I'm trying to teach her how to write her name.
Now, now! Do you have to make so much noise?
This cat's trying to learn how to teach
you girls and boys.






3/2/99

:wink:

 

[RonBee]

Hm

The scientists around here are making a big fuss.
When they took a look at Venus they saw them looking back at us.
They are worried that we should expect a visit from Venus
Now that they have found out that the Venusians have seen us.

;-)


2003/06/25

 

[lucyarliwu]

Here is a funny one I learned from a friend, so that I couldn't help uttering it as long as I 'm ready to take an icecream

You scream!
I scream!
We all scream for icecream!!!!

:lol:

 

[RonBee]

I Told This To My Cat

I had a dream,
A whirly dream,
A squirrely dream.
You'll see what I mean.

"I got to be a cloud,
Tho it isn't really allowed,
I got to be a cloud,
And I did it out loud."

I saw a mouse
As big as a house.
As big as a house?
Yes, a mouse!

I saw a bat wearing a hat
Chasing my cat.
How about that?
How about that!

I saw a frog
Sitting on a dog
Jumping over a log.
Over a log! Frog! Dog! Log!

I am a swimming fish
And it is my wish
That I don't end up
In a dish. In a dish!

I talked to a chair
That wasn't there.
Does anybody care?
Anybody care?

Playing hockey, I like to score,
And I do it more and more.
That's what I do it for.
Score! Score! More! More!

Where's the school nurse?
Could this verse
Get any worse?
Any worse? Verse! Worse! Nurse!

Blueberry pie.
Blueberry pie.
Blueberry pie.
Blueberry pie.
My, oh, my!




(3/5/1999)


:wink:

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[RonBee]

Yum, Yum!

The little mouse
Outside the house
Crept inside that great big house,
But the little cat
Saw the mouse do that,
And the little mouse wound up inside the cat.
How about that?



:wink:


3/11/99

 

[RonBee]

Rosalie Gives Me A Rose

She stands there as if in a pose
And then she hands me a rose.
With her arm outstretched she shows,

Shows me what she has picked with care,
And all I do is stare.
I don't know how long I stood there.

I carefully take it from her;
Then, my feet shifting from one to the other,
I begin to talk, but I stammer.

I start, I start, I don't know what to say.
I'm sweating. It's a very warm day.
I wish the moment would go away.

Then, a happy thought hit me.
It was as simple as could be.
I said, "Thank you for the flower, Rosalie."

Oh, for shame! For shame! For shame!
If only I hadn't spoken that name,
For her name, her name is Mary Jane.





:wink:


4/4/99

 

[RonBee]

Saltine Lover

I have a pet duck named Jack.
When I quack at Jack Jack quacks back.
Jack is one of the quicker quackers.
He's a quacker who quacks quickly.
I like to eat crackers.
I snack on crackers readily.
I’m an eager cracker eater.
My duck's a quick quacker
And I'm a cracker snacker.







2003-06-26

 

[RonBee]

I Once Knew A Guy

I once knew a guy
Who said everything twice.
He was a good guy.
He was really nice.
He was okay,
But he said everything twice.
Once was never enough
To say what he had to say.
He said everything two times
Every day.
He would say something once
And then
He would say it
Again.












8/22/99