Is when here right? Thank you!

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Harry12345

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People in China were deeply hurt when seeing Chinese torechhearerJin Jing attacked in her wheelchair in Paris.

Is it right to use when here? Thank you!
 

Raymott

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People in China were deeply hurt when seeing Chinese torechhearerJin Jing attacked in her wheelchair in Paris.

Is it right to use when here? Thank you!
Hm, I don't like it. It would be better as:
... on seeing ...
... when they saw ...
 

Harry12345

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Mr Raymat
Thank you ! Do you mean it's wrong or it's OK?
 

Raymott

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Mr Raymat
Thank you ! Do you mean it's wrong or it's OK?
It's understandable, but it's not the way a native speaker would normally say it.
I'm reluctant to call it wrong. Maybe someone else will comment.
 

2006

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It's understandable, but it's not the way a native speaker would normally say it.
I'm reluctant to call it wrong. Maybe someone else will comment.
I agree that "were deeply hurt when seeing" is not good and wouldn't be said by native speakers. That grammar suggests that they were already deeply hurt before they saw the torchbearer being attacked.

Raymott's two suggestions are much better, and 'upon seeing' is also used.
 

Harry12345

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Thank you!Mr 2006.:)
 
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