its atmosphere expanding into space in a kind of stellar gale

Flogger

Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2016
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Persian
Home Country
Iran
Current Location
Iran
Hello,

I feel that the bold part of the following sentence is not complete. I really see no reason to use an ing form in this clause. what do you think?

The original:

The Sun will become a red giant star, its visible surface so far from its interior that the gravity at its surface grows feeble, its atmosphere expanding into space in a kind of stellar gale.

My version:

The Sun will become a red giant star, its visible surface so far from its interior that the gravity at its surface grows feeble, and its atmosphere expandsing into space in a kind of stellar gale.

Source: Cosmos
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
No. If you want to make that revision, you need "and its atmosphere will expand int space ...". The original all refers to the future.
 

Flogger

Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2016
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Persian
Home Country
Iran
Current Location
Iran
No. If you want to make that revision, you need "and its atmosphere will expand int space ...". The original all refers to the future.

So why doesn't the text uses the future tense in this part [ its visible surface so far from its interior that the gravity at its surface grows feeble]?
 

emsr2d2

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
British English
Home Country
UK
Current Location
UK
Because the verb isn't necessary. It is connected to the first "The sun will become ...".
 

jutfrank

VIP Member
Joined
Mar 5, 2014
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
England
Current Location
England
I agree that the shift from a predictive clause (will become) into a narrative present clause (grows feeble) is somewhat unusual, but it sounds fine to me.
 

Flogger

Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2016
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Persian
Home Country
Iran
Current Location
Iran
I agree that the shift from a predictive clause (will become) into a narrative present clause (grows feeble) is somewhat unusual, but it sounds fine to me.

Doesn't my version sound fine to you?
 
Top