my experience

Status
Not open for further replies.

bosun

Senior Member
Joined
Nov 9, 2005
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Korean
Home Country
South Korea
Current Location
South Korea
The following is about a statement for college admission. If you see any problems, can I have your comment?

As mentioned above, I belive these sports acitivies and working as a president of club in hight school will help me to adjust to college. I promise that i will do my best if I get accepted to your school. You will never regret choosing me.
 

Niall

Member
Joined
Jan 14, 2007
Member Type
Student or Learner
The following is about a statement for college admission. If you see any problems, can I have your comment?

As mentioned above, I believe these sports acitivies and my working as a president of a club in high school will help me to adjust to college life. I promise that I will do my best if I get accepted to your school. You will never regret choosing me.

There are some simple mistakes. I have added the word "life" to make the phrase "college life" which fits better into this sentence.
The phrase in italics "my working" uses a possessive prounoun with the gerund, which is something we often do in English.
 

puzzle

Senior Member
Joined
Jul 9, 2007
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
China
Current Location
China
NiallRe: my experience
Quote:
Originally Posted by bosun
The following is about a statement for college admission. If you see any problems, can I have your comment?

As mentioned above, I believe these sports acitivies and my working as a president of a club in high school will help me to adjust to college life. I promise that I will do my best if I get accepted to your school. You will never regret choosing me.




:?:Why does "my working as a president of a club" need "a" before "president"? Can't it be omitted? Please.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top