Need Help with Commas

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jenniedepue

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Have I Insert all needed commas in the following letter.


Dear Mr. Crane:
Because you are a person, who does a good deal of traveling in the course of your business activities, we want to bring to your attention a few of the many conveniences to be found at all Sterling hotels and motels.
There is a Sterling hotel, or motel, in every large city throughout the country, and each of them can boast of offering the traveler a haven of comfort at reasonable rates.
As the enclosed brochure will show you each room is beautifully furnished and decorated. The hottest summer days never bother our guests, for every room is comfortably air-conditioned. In addition, to many other recreational facilities all our hotels and motels provide swimming and dancing facilities.
In all sincerity, I know of no other hotel, or motel that offers so much for so little. You can rent a comfortable room with bath for example for as little as $20 a day or take advantage of considerable savings by renting for longer periods.
Our employees, incidentally are carefully selected for their courtesy and alertness. We have an excellent reputation for superior service and we make every effort to maintain it.
When you make your next business trip see for yourself Mr. Crane the outstanding accommodations and service that are provided by Sterling hotels and motels. After you have enjoyed our hospitality, I am sure that you like so many others will make staying at the Sterling a delightful habit.
Very truly yours,
 

Mister Micawber

Key Member
Joined
Sep 26, 2004
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
Japan
No, and you've inserted some in the wrong places. This appears to be homework, so I will correct the first paragraph and then let you try again:

'Because you are a person who does a good deal of traveling in the course of your business activities, we want to bring to your attention a few of the many conveniences to be found at all Sterling hotels and motels.'

Only one comma should be used in this paragraph.
 
J

jenniedepue

Guest
I corrected some that I found. I hope this is right.
Insert any needed commas in the following letter.

Dear Mr. Crane:
Because you are a person who does a good deal of traveling in the course of your business activities, we want to bring to your attention a few of the many conveniences to be found at all Sterling hotels and motels.
There is a Sterling hotel or motel, in every large city throughout the country, and each of them can boast of offering the traveler a haven of comfort at reasonable rates.
As the enclosed brochure will show you, each room is beautifully furnished and decorated. The hottest summer days never bother our guests, for every room is comfortably air-conditioned. In addition, to many other recreational facilities all our hotels and motels provide swimming and dancing facilities.
In all sincerity, I know of no other hotel or motel that offers so much for so little. You can rent a comfortable room with bath, for example, for as little as $20 a day or take advantage of considerable savings by renting for longer periods.
Our employees incidentally are carefully selected for their courtesy and alertness. We have an excellent reputation for superior service and we make every effort to maintain it.
When you make your next business trip see for yourself Mr. Crane the outstanding accommodations and service that are provided by Sterling hotels and motels. After you have enjoyed our hospitality, I am sure that you like so many others will make staying at the Sterling a delightful habit.
Very truly yours,
 
J

jenniedepue

Guest
I hope this is right. I corrected some that I found.
Insert any needed commas in the following letter.

Dear Mr. Crane:
Because you are a person who does a good deal of traveling in the course of your business activities, we want to bring to your attention a few of the many conveniences to be found at all Sterling hotels and motels.
There is a Sterling hotel or motel, in every large city throughout the country, and each of them can boast of offering the traveler a haven of comfort at reasonable rates.
As the enclosed brochure will show you, each room is beautifully furnished and decorated. The hottest summer days never bother our guests, for every room is comfortably air-conditioned. In addition, to many other recreational facilities all our hotels and motels provide swimming and dancing facilities.
In all sincerity, I know of no other hotel or motel that offers so much for so little. You can rent a comfortable room with bath, for example, for as little as $20 a day or take advantage of considerable savings by renting for longer periods.
Our employees incidentally are carefully selected for their courtesy and alertness. We have an excellent reputation for superior service and we make every effort to maintain it.
When you make your next business trip see for yourself Mr. Crane the outstanding accommodations and service that are provided by Sterling hotels and motels. After you have enjoyed our hospitality, I am sure that you like so many others will make staying at the Sterling a delightful habit.
Very truly yours,
 

Mister Micawber

Key Member
Joined
Sep 26, 2004
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
Japan
Pretty good, Jennie. One comma I consider optional, so I have set it in parentheses. To get a feeling for the correctness, read your letter (both your effort and mine) through aloud, pausing for the commas-- the ideas group themselves more naturally this way:

'Dear Mr. Crane:

Because you are a person who does a good deal of traveling in the course of your business activities, we want to bring to your attention a few of the many conveniences to be found at all Sterling hotels and motels.
There is a Sterling hotel or motel in every large city throughout the country, and each of them can boast of offering the traveler a haven of comfort at reasonable rates.
As the enclosed brochure will show you, each room is beautifully furnished and decorated. The hottest summer days never bother our guests, for every room is comfortably air-conditioned. In addition to many other recreational facilities, all our hotels and motels provide swimming and dancing facilities.
In all sincerity, I know of no other hotel or motel that offers so much for so little. You can rent a comfortable room with bath, for example, for as little as $20 a day, or take advantage of considerable savings by renting for longer periods.
Our employees, incidentally, are carefully selected for their courtesy and alertness. We have an excellent reputation for superior service(,) and we make every effort to maintain it.
When you make your next business trip, see for yourself, Mr. Crane, the outstanding accommodations and service that are provided by Sterling hotels and motels. After you have enjoyed our hospitality, I am sure that you, like so many others, will make staying at the Sterling a delightful habit.

Very truly yours,'
 
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