Please revise my sentence!!

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marian4eto

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Please, correct my sentence if needed! :) Thank you! :)

"In addition, she is among the students who receive the University scholarship for excellent grades"
 

David L.

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"In addition, she is among the students who receive the University scholarship for excellent grades"

Who is saying this, about whom, and at what point in time?

"In addition, she is among the students who this year receive the University scholarship for academic merit."

"In addition, she is among the students who received the University scholarship for academic merit."

"In addition, she is among the students who will receive the University scholarship for academic merit."
 
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marian4eto

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:) You are right! I had to say what is it all about! ;-)

Its a sentence from a recommendation letter for a student and the whole paragraph is

[FONT=&quot] "
[FONT=&quot]It has been a pleasure having Monika [/FONT][FONT=&quot]as a student in my classes[/FONT][FONT=&quot]. She[/FONT][FONT=&quot]has [/FONT][FONT=&quot]show[/FONT][FONT=&quot]n [/FONT][FONT=&quot]a strong level of[/FONT][FONT=&quot]dedication,[/FONT][FONT=&quot]understanding[/FONT][FONT=&quot] and initiative,[/FONT][FONT=&quot] and was [/FONT][FONT=&quot]awarded with[/FONT][FONT=&quot] excellent mark[/FONT][FONT=&quot]s[/FONT][FONT=&quot] for h[/FONT][FONT=&quot]er[/FONT][FONT=&quot] performance. I would like to draw your attention to the fact that [/FONT][FONT=&quot]s[/FONT][FONT=&quot]he[/FONT][FONT=&quot] was[/FONT][FONT=&quot]exempt[/FONT][FONT=&quot]ed[/FONT][FONT=&quot]from[/FONT][FONT=&quot]the final [/FONT][FONT=&quot]written exams in [/FONT][FONT=&quot]“Trade Economics” and “Trade Company Marketing”,[/FONT][FONT=&quot]due to the outstanding results she obtained in the examinations during the semester[/FONT][FONT=&quot]. This is a rare [/FONT][FONT=&quot]incident and an honor only granted to exceptional students[/FONT][FONT=&quot].[/FONT][FONT=&quot] In addition, she is among the students who receive the University scholarship for excellent grades.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]This is why I consider Monika to be one of the most studious and responsible members of our [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Department."[/FONT]
[/FONT]
 

David L.

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I'd suggest:

"In addition, she is among the students who have received the University scholarship for academic distinction."
 
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