When David started working in the kitchen

[Bassim]

I am wondering if my sentence is grammatically correct.

When David started working in the kitchen, he made some serious mistakes, which aroused fury in the chief who would shout at him and call him names.

 

[emsr2d2]

Are you sure you meant "chief", not "chef"?

 

[Bassim]

emsr2d2.

I meant "chef", but somehow subconsciously added "i". This mistake happened to me a few times, and I have to remember to write it properly: chef, chef, chef....

 

[emsr2d2]

I am wondering if my sentence is grammatically correct.

When David started working in the kitchen, he made some serious mistakes; [STRIKE]which[/STRIKE] this [STRIKE]aroused fury in[/STRIKE] infuriated the [STRIKE]chief[/STRIKE] chef, who would shout at him and call him names.

See above.

 

[Tdol]

Couldn't we just say would shout and call him names to get sentence length down a bit?