Who, whom, that

[Ju]

1. You should talk to someone who you trust when you are lonely.
2. You should talk to someone whom you trust when you are lonely.
3. You should talk to someone that you trust when you are lonely.
4. You should talk to someone you trust when you are lonely.

Are the above sentences correct, please?

Thanks.

 

[Ju]

I saw number 2 in an article before. I thought "whom" must have a preposition in front grammatically.
E.g.
To whom it may concern.

Thanks.

 

[Ju]

All four are correct.

Some people prefer not to use 'that' (#3) when the antecedent is a person.

'Whom' is used when it is the object of a verb or a preposition. It is rather formal.

Piscean,
Would you mind explaining further a bit about the usage of whom with examples?

Thanks.

 

[Matthew Wai]

1. He is the one about whom I worry.
2. He is the one I worry about.
3. He is the one whom I saw last week.
4. He is the one I saw last week.

I would not use 1 and 3 although they are grammatical.

 

[Ju]

1. He is the one about whom I worry.
2. He is the one I worry about.
3. He is the one whom I saw last week.
4. He is the one I saw last week.

I would not use 1 and 3 although they are grammatical.

For number 3, can I use who to replace whom?

 

[emsr2d2]

Most BrE speakers probably would use "who" there (or nothing at all).

 

[Ju]

Most BrE speakers probably would use "who" there (or nothing at all).

May I ask which one should I choose during examination?

 

[emsr2d2]

May I ask which one [STRIKE]should[/STRIKE] I should choose during an examination?

That's a little hard to answer. Sometimes it depends on the examiner! I would recommend choosing either "whom" or nothing at all. I'd avoid "who".

 

[Matthew Wai]

I don't know who(m) you are talking about.

I would use 'whom' in an exam because it is the grammatical object form of ‘who’.

 

[emsr2d2]

I should have made it clear I was talking only about the sentences in post 5 (which I now realise weren't written by the OP). Of course, in some contexts it's not possible to use "nothing at all".

That's the man to whom I sold my car. :tick:
That's the man to who I sold my car. :cross:
That's the man to I sold my car. :cross:

Of course, "That's the man I sold my car to" avoids the issue.

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

That sentence is not natural with 'whom' and a preposition at the end..

The less formal way is I don't know who you are talking about.
The more formal, and rather stilted, way is I don't know about whom you are talking.

I don't know whom you are talking about is an unhappy mix of two registers.

I don't know of any British examining board that would penalise the less formal way.

You're right, of course. As you've done, it's good to both point out the strict convention and the more natural way of saying something.

I often cite what jazz teachers tell new students: Learn the book, then throw it away.