[Essay] Phuket Fantasea

[Ashiuhto]

Please help me correct the following paragraph. Thanks!

On day 5, we paid a visit to Phuket Fantasea because I had been told that it is the must see show while traveling to Phuket. It is a good entertainment park where you can see elephants, tigers, chickens and even goats in the show. The main attraction is the stage performance given by Thai actors, dancers and acrobats accompanied by their dozen massive elephants. It is quite impressive and I wonder how they trained them.

 

[PeterValk]

I'm not a teacher nor a native English speaker.

I don't see too many things wrong with this text, just a few:
"while travelling to Phuket" means "on the way to Phuket" when, obviously you mean "while staying on Phuket"
Also, since you're saying it's a must-see show, I would consider changing "good" to "great" (a great entertainment park)
Maybe the real teachers have something to add.