can you check my essay and grade for toefl, thanks!

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cinemaniac

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[h=2]Compare and contrast your way of life with that of your parents. Which way of life do you think would be more satisfying to future generations?[/h]Do you think i responded well to question or do i not have a good essay unity?

The time has been changed. There are differences between the way of my life and my parents. I believe present time is better for future generations. These differences shows themselves in terms of technologic changes, life standards and behaviours of society.
To begin with, technology have changed compare to back in time. There are new features which do not exist before. We have advanced technology now such as smart phones, internet etc. For sure, the technology comes with advantages and disadvantages. People can use it in a good way or in a bad way. For example, internet is very helpful for students. They can find everthing on the internet like lecture notes, study resources, useful lecture videos. They do not need encyclopedias anymore. They do not depend on libraries. These save time for them. Smart phones are useful for connection to each other. It helps to reach our friends, family even from differenct countries. Nowadays, the world is a place like that no boundaries. On the other hand, we loose face to face communication. People were communicate with each other more in my parent's time. Nevertheless, the addition of technology to society is undeniable.
Later on, development in many areas increased the life standards. For instance, health opportunities are improved a lot. Before that many people were dying because of lack of treatment. At the same time, future generation will have difficulties to find eat organic food. It will affect their health. For example, my parents always mention how fruits and vegetables were natural. In the mean time, farmers start to use drugs for their products because they want them more good looking, fresh and increasing their resistance to insects or illnesses. However, government try to control the usage of drugs in the farms so the risk will be decreased. Improved life standards are better for future generations.
Finally, people are aware of equality and they respect each other. They are more open-minded. We can see people fight together for human rights whereas people did not care much for the other people before.
In conclusion, the world had a long process to change and it changed in a positive way. I prefer to live my life as now instead of living in the times of my parents. It has better options for future generations such as technology, life conditions and careful society. In my opinion, it is more satisfying to them.
 

Tarheel

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cinemaniac

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It is for practicing. It is not an assignment. I will have Toefl exam.

Thanks for your help
 

Tarheel

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It is for practicing. It is not an assignment. I will have Toefl exam.

Thanks for your help.

Say:

It is for practice. It is not an assignment. I am studying for the TOEFL exam.

You're welcome.
:)
 

Tarheel

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I believe the present time is better for future generations. These differences show themselves in terms of technological changes, standards of living and behaviours of society.

I am not sure what you mean by the first sentence, and I am even more puzzled by the second one.
:-?
 

Tarheel

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To begin with, technology has changed. Some things that we have today did not exist before.

Really?

We have advanced technology now such as smart phones, the Internet etc.

Smart phones qualify as advance technology, but the Internet is a way of using the technology that we have.

:)
 

Tarheel

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For sure, [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] technology comes with advantages and disadvantages.

Doesn't that apply to everything?

People can use it in a good way or in a bad way.

See above.

For example, the Internet is very helpful for students. They can find everything on the internet like lecture notes, study resources, useful lecture videos. They do not need encyclopedias anymore.

Actually, the encyclopedias are online.
:)
 

Tarheel

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Smart phones are useful for connection to each other. It helps to reach our friends, family even from differenct countries.

Perhaps:

Smart phones have created a revolution in technology. Peoploe can contact friends and family -- people both near and far -- in an instant.​

Nowadays, the world is a place that has no boundaries. On the other hand, we lose face to face communication.

:up:
 

Tarheel

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People were communicate with each other more in my parent's time. Nevertheless, the addition of technology to society is undeniable.

How should you change that? (Please do not make changes to the original post.)
:)
 
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