i am english learner, please help me corret this text, wanna improve my writing

[Vincen't Wong]

Recently, you saw an old couple entering a luxury flats complex. On several earlier occasions you have seen them begging on the street and have given them money.
Write a letter to the local newspaper, describing your experience and suggesting ways to help beggars Other than by giving them money

Dear editor,
I am writing to share my experience on a beggars’ problem and provide some suggestions to help them instead of giving them money.

I am a good-hearted person and used to helping beggars by money. Recently, I saw an old couple who was beggars I helped entering a luxury flat complex. I was shock so I decided to find out if they were beggars or not. I went to their usually begging place next day and I did see them who were begging next to the MTR station. I was so disappointed because they took advantages from my kindness and I helped the wrong people.

I believed that there are still many beggars who need our help. We should keep helping them. However, we do not want to be deceived by those immoral people. I would like to give some suggestion to help real beggars in need rather than offering money.

To begin with, if good-hearted people like me see beggars who are begging money on the street, we can give them food, clothes and daily necessaries to them other than money. For example, we can give them McDonald’s food, food containers and even toothbrush. If they are people in need, they will be grateful as those things are what they want. However, if they are deceivers, I am sure that they will hate you so much because it is useless for those greedy deceivers. Therefore, I believe that giving practical things to them is the best way for helping people.

Besides, I suggest that kind citizens can donate money to chartable non-profit organizations such as Oxfam and Po Leung Kuk rather than donating money to beggars directly. These organizations have wide variety of resources for the beggars such as free education, medical treatment, food and even temporary house. We can donate money to these organizations so as to improve their facilities and support their daily expenses. It means that giving them money is equal to helping beggars in need. Also, the donation they are received opens to public on website. You can check where your donation goes and who received your donation. As a result, the organizations are trustworthy.

Finally, education is important as well. These beggars’ immoral behaviors result from the lack of moral education. Government should put more resources on school education so that people can know greed is misbehavior. For example, school can set up moral education class everyday to cultivate people’ habit of doing right things. Therefore, these well-educated people would not deceive others for sure.

I hope my suggestions are helpful to solve the problem of beggars. Our money needed to be donated in the way.
Yours faithfully,
Chris Wong

 

[teechar]

Dear editor,
I am writing to share my experience with some beggars and to provide some suggestions to help them instead of giving them money.

I am a good-hearted person and used to helping beggars by giving them money. Recently, I saw an old couple who were beggars I had helped previously, entering a luxury flats complex. I was shocked so I decided to find out if they were beggars or not. I went to their usually begging place next day and I did see them begging next to the MTR station. I was so disappointed because they took advantage of my kindness and I felt that I had helped the wrong people.

I believe that there are still many beggars who need our help and we should keep helping them. However, we do not want to be deceived by those immoral people such as the couple in question. I would like to give some suggestions to help real beggars in need other than offering them money.

To begin with, if good-hearted people like me see beggars who are begging for money on the street, we can give them food, clothes and daily necessaries instead of money. For example, we can give them some fast food, food containers and even items such as toothbrushes and toothpaste. If they are people in need, they will be grateful as those things are what they need. However, if they are deceivers, I am sure that they will hate you so much because such items would be useless for those greedy deceivers. Therefore, I believe that giving practical things to beggars is the best way of helping them.

Besides, I suggest that kind citizens can donate money to charitable non-profit organizations such as Oxfam and Po Leung Kuk rather than donating money to beggars directly. These organizations provide a wide variety of resources for beggars such as free education, medical treatment, food and even temporary housing. We can donate money to these organizations so as to improve their facilities and support their daily expenses. It means that giving them money is equal to helping beggars in need. Also, the donations they receive are opens for the public to see on their websites. You can check where your donation goes and who received your donation. As a result, those organizations are trustworthy.

Finally, education is important as well. These beggars’ immoral behaviors result from the lack of moral education. The government should put more resources into school education so that people can know that greed is misbehavior. For example, schools can set up daily moral education classes to cultivate people’s habit of doing the right thing, and reducing the likelihood of future misbehaviour.

I hope my suggestions are helpful to solve the problem of beggars. Our money needs to be donated in the right way.
Yours faithfully,
Chris Wong

 

[Vincen't Wong]

thank you so much teacher