An American killed his little girl

[Atchan]

Are there mistakes in this passage? Because I have translated it from Arabic language.
I know that this real story has happened two weeks ago but I didn’t get time to translate it because I had been watching world cup games.

An American killed his little girl in order to watch America and Ghana’s game in the world cup without disturbance

An American man ventured to kill his little girl in order to watch America and Ghana’s game in the world cup which host in South Africa in restful and without disturbance style. The Monitor newspaper which published on Tuesday mentioned the twenty-seven-year man who descend from Texas acknowledged to the police that he killed his little girl Amman twice on her chest because she didn’t stop shrieking during the game. When the girl stopped breathing, the dad tried to refresh her heart but usefulness. According to the police report, the dad putted nails into his girl’s mouth to make the matter as an incident caused of his girl’s dead.

When girl’s mom came back to the house she found her girl being unconscious and her body was cold and having a pale color. The report of autopsy demonstrated that the little girl exposed to four fractures in her rip.

Please check my English Expression, Grammar and other mistakes or suggest any other verb or sentence that can make beautiful this paragraph. Do grade me out of 10.

Thanking you for your support and kindness.

[IHIVG]

Are there mistakes in this passage because I have translated it from Arabic language?
I know that this real story has happened two weeks ago but I didn’t get time to translate it because I had been watching world cup games.

An American killed his little girl in order to watch America and Ghana's game in the world cup without disturbance

(If this is the heading, make it shorter and closer to the point: An American killed his little girl during US-Ghana game.)

An American man ventured to kill (He didn't venture - he just killed) his little girl in order to watch America and Ghana’s game in the world cup which host in South Africa in restful and without disturbance style. because he didn't want her to disturb him during the World Cup's game between US and Ghana. The Monitor newspaper which published on Tuesday, mentioned that the twenty-seven years old man, who descend from lives in Texas, acknowledged confessed to the police, that he killed his little girl Amman twice (you can't kill the person twice) on her chest, because she didn’t stop shrieking during the game. When the girl stopped breathing, the man tried to refresh her heart (I'm not sure what it means but it needs rewording) but usefulness it was too late. According to the police report, the dad putted nails into his girl’s mouth to make the matter as an incident caused of his girl’s dead. (I don't understand this)

When the girl’s mom came back to the house home, she found her girl being unconscious; her body was cold and pale having a pale color. The report of autopsy demonstrated that the little girl exposed to had four fractures in her rip. (What's rip? Ribs?)

Please do check my English Expression, Grammar and other mistakes or suggest any other verb or sentence that can make beautiful this paragraph. Do grade me out of 10.

Thanking you for your support and kindness.

I gave it a start, maybe someone else will want to take it further.

[Atchan]

That he killed beated his little girl Amman twice (you can't kill the person twice) on her chest.

The dad putted nails into his girl’s mouth to make the matter as an incident caused of his girl’s dead. (I don't understand this) >>> I mean that he put some nails into his girl’s mouth to make others think or believe that she died normally.

The man tried to refresh her heart (I'm not sure what it means but it needs rewording) >>> I mean he tried to revive her or her heart.

(What's rip? Ribs?) Its the bone that curves round from your back to your chest.

You really did a great job thank you friend. But you didn’t grade for me out of 10.
My last order, can you explain for me the reason that I did all of these mistakes? I mean what you think of? Should I study Grammar well, Should I write English more and more?

[IHIVG]

That he beated (beat, beat, beaten) his little girl Amman twice on her chest.

The dad putted nails into his girl’s mouth to make the matter as an incident caused of his girl’s dead. (I don't understand this) >>> I mean that he put some nails into his girl’s mouth to make others think or believe that she died normally. This is a good sentence from grammatical standpoint (but does the nails part make sense? I mean, whose nails? And why would that convince others of the natural cause of death?)

(What's rip? Ribs?) Its the bone that curves round from your back to your chest. It's called ribs, not 'rip'.

The man tried to refresh her heart (I'm not sure what it means but it needs rewording) >>> I mean he tried to revive her or her heart.
This is a better wording.

You really did a great job thank you friend. You're welcome!
But you didn’t grade for me out of 10. I don't understand anything about how those grades work.
My last order, can you explain for me the reason that I did all of these mistakes? I mean what you think of? Should I study Grammar well, Should I write English more and more?
I think the best way is to read - that's how you'll get a natural feel on how sentences are constructed.

^

[Atchan]

The dad putted nails into his girl’s mouth to make the matter as an incident caused of his girl’s dead. (I don't understand this) >>> I mean that he put some nails into his girl’s mouth to make others think or believe that she died normally. This is a good sentence from grammatical standpoint (but does the nails part make sense? I mean, whose nails? And why would that convince others of the natural cause of death?) After I posted it I realized that it isn't natural death its crime.

I'm grateful for your deep explanation thank you my friend. In the next several days I will read English books or novel books but when I write story and post to this wonderful forum try to check it.

Thank you very much and nice to meet you!

[Gillnetter]

Are there mistakes in this passage because I have translated it from Arabic language?
I know that this real story has happened two weeks ago but I didn’t get time to translate it because I had been watching world cup games.

An American killed his little girl in order to watch America and Ghana’s game in the world cup without disturbance

An American man ventured to kill killed his little girl in order to watch America and Ghana’s game in the World Cup which host in South Africa in restful and without disturbance style. The Monitor newspaper, which published the story on Tuesday, mentioned that the twenty-seven-year man, who descend from lives in Texas, acknowledged to the police that he killed his little girl Amman twice on her chest because she didn’t wouldn't stop shrieking during the game. When the girl stopped breathing, the dad tried to refresh revive her heart but usefulness couldn't. According to the police report, the dad putted put nails into his girl’s mouth to make the matter as an incident caused nails seem to be the cause of his girl’s dead.

When the girl’s mom came back to the house she found her girl being unconscious and her body was cold and having a pale color. The report of autopsy report demonstrated noted that the little girl exposed to had four fractures in her rip ribs.

Please check my English Expression, Grammar and other mistakes or suggest any other verb or sentence that can make beautiful this paragraph. Do grade me out of 10.

Thanking you for your support and kindness.

I believe that you were trying to write that the man had hit the child twice on the chest, but that was unclear to me. Amman is usually a boy's name (Not a common name in the US). The name seems to be common in India and the Middle East. The World Cup should be capitalized since it is the name of an event. The past tense of put is not putted, it is put. I would rate this text as a 6 out of 10. I mostly understood it but you need to find better words to express yourself.

[Susan612]

I have made corrections partly based on the news story I found about this incident: Here's a link to the report of the story I found: Texas man kills daughter over World Cup annoyance - Monsters and Critics

Are there mistakes in this passage because I have translated it from Arabic language?
I know that this real story has happened two weeks ago but I didn’t get time to translate it because I had been watching world cup games.

An American killed his little girl in order to watch America and Ghana’s game in the world cup without disturbance

An American man ventured to killed his step-daughter in order to watch the World Cup game between America and Ghana which host in South Africa in restful and undisturbed. The Monitor newspaper story published on Tuesday stated that the twenty-seven-year-old man who lives in Texas acknowledged to the police that he killedstruck his little girl Amman twice on her chest because she didn’t stop shrieking during the game. When the girl stopped breathing, the dad tried to resuscitate her, but it was no use. According to the police report, the dad putted a screw(according to the news story I found) into his daughter's throat to make the death appear accidental.

When the girl’s mother came back to the house, she found her daughter being unconscious, cold and pale. The autopsy report showed that the girl had four fractured ribs.






Please check my English Expression, Grammar and other mistakes or suggest any other verb or sentence that can make beautiful this paragraph. Do grade me out of 10.

Thanking you for your support and kindness.

[Atchan]

Thank you friends.

[Gillnetter]

Thank you friends.

An illegal immigrant living in America killed his step-daughter in order to watch the World Cup game between America and Ghana undisturbed. The Monitor newspaper, story published on Tuesday, stated that the twenty-seven-year-old man, who lives in Texas, acknowledged to the police that he struck the little girl twice on her chest because she wouldn't stop shrieking during the game. When the girl stopped breathing, the man tried to resuscitate her, but it was no use. According to the police report, the dad forced a screw into his step-daughter's throat to make the death appear accidental.

When the girl’s mother came back to the house, she found her daughter being unconscious, cold and pale. The autopsy report showed that the girl had four fractured ribs, which were weeks old.