Translation project - could anyone have a quick look at it?

[Mr. Parchman]

Hi... I am almost done with my translation studies in Austria and this is one of my last projects I have to do. I would really appreciate it if anyone could read through the texts in order to make sure there is nothing that sounds not English enough or which doesn't make sense. It should not be too bad so I hope it won't take long to have a quick look at the texts. I underlined the things I wasn't quite sure of.
Thanks in advance!

Text1:

Opening address by

Univ.-Prof. Dr. Reinhart Waneck, State Secretary of Health

at the

1st Transnational Conference of the German-Speaking Networks of Health Promoting Hospitals

6th Austrian Conference of Health Promoting Hospitals

November 12, Vienna City Hall

“The Hospitalas a Healthy Workplace: Health promotion

for staff – positions from staff, management and patients.”

Dear Ladies and Gentlemen!

It gives me great pleasure to welcome you to the Sixth Austrian Conference on Health Promoting Hospitals. It is a particular pleasure to be able to announce that this conference is organised in close collaboration with the German Network of Health Promoting Hospitals and that an effective exchange of ideas on the topic “The Hospital as a Healthy Workplace” can be facilitated.

Supported by the Austrian Ministry of Health and Women, the Austrian Network of Health Promoting Hospitals was established in 1996 with the aim of spreading the idea of health promotion to the Austrian hospitals and supporting them in the development and implementation of health promotion strategies and programs.

It is important to build hospital networks, to exchange experience and to cooperate with different partners in order to promote health and improve quality. But what makes these days so special?

We are facing demographic change, particularly an increasing proportion of elderly in the population and a changing spectrum of disease, most notably an increase in chronic disease. In the last few years diagnostic and therapeutic methods have significantly improved, the use of complex medical equipment has increased and new treatment methods have been established. Due to these developments the types/scope of medical services rendered have changed considerably. In addition a reduced length of stay combined with increasing hospitalisation rates leads to a noticeable increase in medical services provided by the hospitals. Hospital staff consequently have heavy and more intense workloads.

Considering the fact that working conditions in hospitals can result in the hospital staff being exposed to physical and psychological health risks, we have to pay greater attention to the situation of hospital staff and support them now and in the future. It is of particular importance to encourage health promotion measures for this highly stressed occupation group.

The title of the conference “The Hospital as a Healthy Workplace: Health promotion for staff” already implies that in the centre of health promotion efforts and strategies are the people. From the viewpoint of health promotion, staff orientation is a key issue as health promotion strategies and concepts also focus on the improvement of the health and well-being of hospital staff. Besides considering the patient’s perspective and the quality of the medical services, the Austrian Network of Health Promoting Hospitals places great value on the hospital staff’s perspective.

The aim of this conference is to discuss various strategies and projects that contribute to promoting staff health. Health promotion can have different goals: promotion of good health, increase of patient satisfaction and improvement of quality of life by better treatment and care. However, the development of strategies for the empowerment of staff to assume responsibility for their own health and to become an active part of health promotion has grown increasingly important.

Experience shows that it is difficult to promote health and to actively implement health promotion strategies in addition to the normal routine in hospitals and other healthcare facilities. However, especially within the context of a staff oriented approach, it is nonetheless very important to set the focus on health promotion in order to improve working conditions in hospitals.

Let me take this opportunity to express my appreciation to the partner hospitals. Not only do I appreciate your efforts to put the idea of health promotion into practice by introducing up and coming projects but also your great commitment and active cooperation with the Austrian network. Together we can achieve the goals we have set ourselves.

It gives me great pleasure that so many of you have come here to discuss an impressing number of different projects related to health promotion and quality management in hospitals. Our workshops and projects cover topics that will provide a good insight into the areas we will have to keep working on.

I am convinced that this conference marks another milestone in the successful work of the Austrian Network of Health Promoting Hospitals and that it will give you the opportunity for a rich exchange of experience.

I wish you all every success for this conference!

[Mr. Parchman]

Text 2:

09.40 am – 10.20 am
The training and assessment of oral skills in the context of the UNIcert® and CEF (Common European Framework)

Spoken language production is an essential part of general and specific foreign language competence. UNIcert® provides training and assessment for the different levels of language competence. Language teachers often find it more difficult or more complex to asses their students’ oral proficiency than the assessment of written exams. On the basis of examples from UNIcert® English Level III and others this discussion aims at examining how oral skills can be trained and assessed efficiently and effectively with regard to the UNIcert® system and the CEF. After determining the level of proficiency to be aimed at, it is necessary to differentiate between standardised assessment and assessment based on special criteria. Assessment methods will be compared in terms of their objectivity or subjectivity and there will also be a discussion about the transparency of the assessment process. When using holistic and analytical oriented strategies various different approaches to preparation and assessment can be found. Foreign language communication does not only consist of oral language skills but also of communication and professional skills as well as non-verbal, social and cultural skills. Therefore it is very important to continuously improve assessment methods by implementing tools like the Deming cycle (plan-do-check-act) and effective training of examiners in order to maintain the quality of oral language skills. However, it is not only the examiners who are responsible for improvement but also the students themselves who can constantly improve their performance by using the feedback they are given. Especially during the training period it is important for students to get constructive feedback to be fully prepared for their final exams. The preparation and running of oral exams is an inherent part of modern language teaching. UNIcert® and CEF support language teachers by providing professional frameworks for efficient preparation periods and transparent examination procedures.

[Gillnetter]

Hi... I am almost done with my translation studies in Austria and this is one of my last projects I have to do. I would really appreciate it if anyone could read through the texts in order to make sure there is nothing that sounds not English enough or which doesn't make sense. It should not be too bad so I hope it won't take long to have a quick look at the texts. I underlined the things I wasn't quite sure of.
Thanks in advance!

Text1:

Opening address by

Univ.-Prof. Dr. Reinhart Waneck, State Secretary of Health

at the

1st Transnational Conference of the German-Speaking Networks of Health Promoting Hospitals

6th Austrian Conference of Health Promoting Hospitals

November 12, Vienna City Hall

“The Hospitalas Hospitals a Healthy Workplace: Health promotion

for staff – positions from staff, management and patients.”

{“The Hospitals a Healthy Workplace: Health Promotion for Staff, Management and Patients.”
{I deleted “positions from staff” since the term seems to be the same as “staff”}

Dear Ladies and Gentlemen!
{If this is a speech, I would not use "Dear". Dear is a term that is used mostly in written communications. Also, I would not use the exclamation point}
It gives me great pleasure to welcome you to the Sixth Austrian Conference on Health Promoting Hospitals. It is a particular pleasure to be able to announce that this conference is organised in close collaboration with the German Network of Health Promoting Hospitals and that an effective exchange of ideas on the topic “The Hospital as a Healthy Workplace” can be facilitated.

Supported by the Austrian Ministry of Health and Women, the Austrian Network of Health Promoting Hospitals was established in 1996 with the aim of spreading the idea of health promotion to the Austrian hospitals and supporting them in the development and implementation of health promotion strategies and programs.

It is important to build hospital networks, to exchange experience and to cooperate with different partners in order to promote health and improve quality. But what makes these days so special? {I don't understand why this question is here.}

We are facing demographic change {either "a demographic change" or "demographic changes"}, particularly an increasing proportion of elderly in the population and a changing spectrum of diseases {Disease could be used here if the reference is to disease as a force; as a separate entity. Diseases could be used if you are referring to the various illnesses that affect people.} , most notably an increase in chronic diseases. In the last few years, diagnostic and therapeutic methods have significantly improved, the use of complex medical equipment has increased and new treatment methods have been established. Due to these developments, the types/scope types of medical services rendered have changed considerably. In addition, a reduced length of stay combined with increasing hospitalisation rates leads to a noticeable increase in medical services provided by the hospitals. Hospital staff consequently have heavy and more intense workloads.
{I would change this to - Consequently, hospital staffs have heavy and more intense workloads}
Considering the fact that working conditions in hospitals can result in the hospital staff being exposed to physical and psychological health risks, we have to pay greater attention to the situation of hospital staff and support them now and in the future. It is of particular importance to encourage health promotion measures for this highly stressed occupation occupational group.

The title of the conference, “The Hospital as a Healthy Workplace: Health Promotion for Staff”, already implies that in the centre of health promotion efforts and strategies are the people. From the viewpoint of health promotion, staff orientation is a key issue as health promotion strategies and concepts also focus on the improvement of the health and well-being of hospital staff. Besides considering the patient’s perspective and the quality of the medical services, the Austrian Network of Health Promoting Hospitals places great value on the hospital staff’s perspective.

The aim of this conference is to discuss various strategies and projects that contribute to promoting staff health. Health promotion can have different goals: promotion of good health, increase of patient satisfaction and improvement of quality of life by better treatment and care. However, the development of strategies for the empowerment of staff to assume responsibility for their own health and to become an active part of health promotion has grown increasingly important.

Experience shows that it is difficult to promote health and to actively implement health promotion strategies in addition to the normal routine in hospitals and other healthcare facilities. However, especially within the context of a staff oriented approach, it is nonetheless, very important to set the focus on health promotion in order to improve working conditions in hospitals.

[Experience shows that it is difficult to promote health and to actively implement health promotion strategies for hospital staff members in addition to the normal routines in hospitals and other healthcare facilities. However, especially within the context of a staff oriented approach, it is nonetheless, very important to set the focus on health promotion in order to improve working conditions in hospitals.

Let me take this opportunity to express my appreciation to the partner hospitals. Not only do I appreciate your efforts to put the idea of health promotion into practice by introducing up-and-coming projects but also your great commitment and active cooperation with the Austrian network. Together, we can achieve the goals we have set for ourselves.

It gives me great pleasure that so many of you have come here to discuss an impressing impressive number of different projects related to health promotion and quality management in hospitals. Our workshops and projects cover topics that will provide a good insights into the areas that we will have to keep working on.

I am convinced that this conference marks another milestone in the successful work of the Austrian Network of Health Promoting Hospitals and that it will give you the opportunity for a rich exchange of experience.

I wish you all every success for this conference!

Here is some editing for you to consider. Some of the changes I suggest are matters of style.

[Gillnetter]

Text 2:

09.40 am – 10.20 am
The training and assessment of oral skills in the context of the UNIcert® and CEF (Common European Framework)

Spoken language production is an essential part of general and specific foreign language competence. UNIcert® provides training and assessment for the different levels of language competence. Language teachers often find it more difficult, or more complex, to asses assess their students’ oral proficiency than the assessment of written exams. On the basis of examples from UNIcert® English Level III and others, this discussion aims at examining {will examine or hopes to examine} how oral skills can be trained taught and assessed, efficiently and effectively, with regard to the UNIcert® system and the CEF. After determining the level of proficiency to be aimed at {To aim is to point at. A better term might be "desired"}, it is necessary to differentiate between standardised assessment and assessment based on special criteria. Assessment methods will be compared in terms of their objectivity or subjectivity and there will also be a discussion about the transparency of the assessment process. When using holistic and analytical oriented strategies, various different approaches to preparation and assessment can be found. Foreign language communication does not only consist of oral language skills but also of communication {oral language is communication. Do you mean "written communication?} and professional skills as well as non-verbal,{What is a non-verbal skill?} social and cultural skills. Therefore, it is very important to continuously improve assessment methods by implementing tools like the Deming Cycle (plan-do-check-act) and the effective training of examiners in order to maintain the quality of oral language skills. {I don't know how someone other than the speaker can maintain the quality of language skills - maybe you mean maintaining the quality of the instruction of oral language} However, it is not only the examiners who are responsible for improvement but also the students themselves, who can constantly improve their performance by using the feedback they are given. Especially during the training period, it is important for students to get constructive feedback to so they can be fully prepared for their final exams. The preparation and running {delivery?} of oral exams is an inherent part of modern language teaching. UNIcert® and CEF supports language teachers by providing professional frameworks for efficient preparation periods and transparent examination procedures.

Here is some editing for you to consider. I believe it be helpful if you reviewed the use of commas.

[Mr. Parchman]

Thank you very much for your comments. They helped me a lot. I know that I got problems with commas. I will have to do something about that. I just finished the last text of my project. I would be really glad if you could also have a look at this one. This was the hardest of all translations so it may be a bit worse than the other texts. Thanks in advance!!

Text3:

10.35 am – 11.15 am
Blended learning in international study programmes as a bridge between language teaching and intercultural learning

The Bologna Process demands the promotion of language skills und intercultural competencies and aims to create a European higher education area involving e-learning and blended learning in order to remove obstacles to mobility. Blended learning combines different learning methods like face-to-face instruction and e-learning and attempts to apply them in an interactively meaningful learning environment. The creation of such an attractive learning environment specifically geared towards target groups could lead to a new learning culture. We will present/There will be presented the concept of a blended learning course on intercultural communication which is attended by students participating in international study programmes in a foreign language. The instructional model especially aims to meet the different language requirements of students/learners and to give them a chance to communicate in the foreign language. Discussions will be held on the implementation of learning platforms containing learning material and how the courses can (be complemented in a didactically sensible way) benefit in terms of didactics from this implementation. A further topic of discussion will be the effort teachers have to put into these learning scenarios and how learning platforms can, for example, serve as a medium of communication between students from different countries in order to find joint solutions for intercultural case studies. At this point (we will present) experience derived from a case study project with a US partner university will be presented. Based on the results of various student surveys regarding their motivation, experience and performance in the intercultural communication course, we will look into the question whether this teaching method promotes the improvement of the students’ foreign language skills/communication skills in a foreign language. The basic idea behind this learning concept is to make it possible for students to apply the knowledge by providing authentic contexts and to promote the learning process with the help of case studies, international projects and reflection of personal experience in the foreign language. Within this framework both, the practical application of intercultural knowledge acquired through the students’ experience, and the improvement of foreign language (communication) skills should be taken into consideration.

[Gillnetter]

Thank you very much for your comments. They helped me a lot. I know that I got problems with commas. I will have to do something about that. I just finished the last text of my project. I would be really glad if you could also have a look at this one. This was the hardest of all translations so it may be a bit worse than the other texts. Thanks in advance!!

Text3:

10.35 am – 11.15 am
Blended learning in international study programmes as a bridge between language teaching and intercultural learning

The Bologna Process demands the promotion of language skills und and intercultural competencies and aims{"aims' strikes me as somehow lowering the level of the language used in this text. Other choices are: aspires, plans, intends, endeavors, seeks, or, strives to} to create a European higher education area involving e-learning and blended learning in order to remove obstacles to mobility {An example of an obstacle to mobility occurs when a person in a wheelchair cannot enter a building due to a narrow doorway. I believe that you are trying to say that this type of learning can occur anywhere, regardless of where the student is.} . Blended learning combines different learning methods like such as face-to-face instruction and e-learning and attempts to apply them in an interactively, meaningful, learning environment. The creation of such an attractive learning environment, specifically geared towards target groups, could lead to a new learning culture. We will present/There will be presented {Either way} the concept of a blended learning course on intercultural communication which is will be attended by students participating in international study programmes in a foreign language {I'm unsure if the the programs will be about foreign languages or if they will be conducted in a foreign language}. The instructional model especially aims to meet the different language requirements of students/learners and to give them a chance to communicate in the {"a" if it's any foreign language, "the" if it is a distinct foreign language} foreign language. Discussions will be held on the implementation of learning platforms containing learning material and how the courses can (be complemented in a didactically sensible way) benefit in terms of didactics from this implementation {Either option}. A further topic of discussion will be the effort teachers have to put into these learning scenarios and how learning platforms can, for example, serve as a medium of communication between students from different countries in order to find joint solutions for intercultural case studies. At this point (we will present) experience derived from a case study project with a US partner university will be presented {either option}. Based on the results of various student surveys regarding their motivation, experience and performance in the intercultural communication course, we will look into the question of whether this teaching method promotes the improvement of the students’ foreign language skills/communication skills in a foreign language. The basic idea behind this learning concept is to make it possible for students to apply the knowledge {What knowledge?}by providing authentic contexts and to promote the learning process with the help of case studies, international projects and reflection of personal experience in the foreign language. Within this framework both the practical application of intercultural knowledge, acquired through the students’ experience, and the improvement of foreign language (communication) skills should be taken into consideration.

It flows nicely but needs a bit of clarification.

[Mr. Parchman]

Thank you very much!!! You really helped me with this project!