can you please check my essay( i going to take TOEFL IBT after 3 days)

[capitan]

PLEASE check my essay i going to take TOEFL exam after 3 days and i have no one to check my essays.

topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? physical exercise should be a required part of every school day.

Sport was the important part of school's curriculum for many years and still one of the important aspects of educational system. Some people think that it is the waste of time to make sport important part of school's curriculum. Others think contrary to them. I strongly believe that sport must have strong place on school curriculum. Below i would like to illustrate several reasons and examples to support my point of view.

First and foremost, i would like to mention that physical and mental abilities are correlated with each other. According to scholar's research on school children, it has been revealed that physical and mental qualities of children are connected. Due to this schools must provide their students with necessary sport activities. Furthermore sport relief stress and so if schools will provide necessary condition for children to make sport, children will be much more concentrated on their studies.

Moreover, it is crucial to highlight that by doing sport children can learn new skills which they will need in future. As a matter of fact, schools and universities are the places that prepare students for their future life and so schools must provide students with necessary sport activities, because student can gain tremendous amount of necessary skills by making sport .for instance by playing football students can gain such skills as cooperating with others, how to make plan, strategies or they can learn that if they want to succeed they must work hard and practice.

Last but not least, i would like to stress that nowadays it is not important only to have good knowledge in order to get work. In order to get good job people must possess good appearance, and so in order to have good appearance people required to have physical education in order to have successful future.

In conclusion, taking into account all reasons and examples stated above i would like to accentuate that sport must have strong place on school curriculum. Physical and mental abilities are correlated with each other. Sport helps people to be in good health condition. Nowadays it is not important only to have good knowledge in order to get work

[Gillnetter]

PLEASE check my essay i going to take TOEFL exam after 3 days and i have no one to check my essays.

topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? physical exercise should be a required part of every school day.

Sports was were the an important part of a school's curriculum for many years and still one of the important aspects of the educational system. Some people think that it is the waste of time to make sports an important part of a school's curriculum. Others think contrary to them. I strongly believe that sports must have a strong place on school curriculum. Below I would like to illustrate several reasons and examples to support my point of view.

First and foremost, I would like to mention that physical and mental abilities are correlated with each other. According to scholar's research on school children, it has been revealed that the physical and mental qualities of children are connected. Due to this, schools must provide their students with necessary sports activities. Furthermore, sports relief stress, and so, if schools will would provide the necessary conditions for children to make play sports, children will be much more concentrated concentrate more on their studies.

Moreover, it is crucial to highlight that by doing playing sports, children can learn new skills which they will need in the future. As a matter of fact, schools and universities are the places that prepare students for their future life and so schools must provide students with necessary sports activities, because student can gain a tremendous amount of necessary skills by making playing sports. For instance, by playing football, students can gain such skills as cooperating with others, how to make plans, strategies or and they can learn that if they want to succeed they must work hard and practice.

Last but not least, I would like to stress that nowadays it is not important only to have good knowledge in order to get work. In order to get a good job, people must possess a good appearance, and so in order to have a good appearance, people are required to have physical education in order to have successful future.

In conclusion, taking into account all the reasons and examples stated above I would like to accentuate that sports must have a strong place on the school curriculum. Physical and mental abilities are correlated with each other. Sports helps people to be in good health condition healthy. Nowadays it is not important only to have good knowledge in order to get work

#1 - I is always capitalized
#2. Sport is singular. More than one sport is plural - sports.
#3. You should study the use of articles. I added 10 articles during the editing of this piece. I suggest that you review countable and uncountable nouns to see how and when articles should be used.

[capitan]

ohh thank you for your help