"Money in our lives" Please check this essay for me!

Our lives are gradually improving and our money need for daily life is thus on the increase. It is obvious that money is very helpful to us, but in addition to their benefits, there are many downsides that it has brought to life.

Firstly, money brings about a lot ot advantages as seen from the fact. We use it to equip our houses with furniture, to buy food, clothes and all other things we need to live comfortably. Money is an essential condition for every student to go to school and for every patient to see a doctor. Moreover, we can use it for charity to help the unfortunate feel somewhat materially compensated. Without money, our lives are penurious, it is very hard to meet the minimum requirements in life, which is simply eating or drinking.

Apart from those advantages, there are numerous downsides brought to us by money. First of all, it makes us grasping. Undeniably, money is very valuable in life, the more money we earn, the more materials we have. Therefore, people always try their best to earn as much money as possible due to their desire to have a better life. Some, however, do not. They want more money simply because of their rivalries. They wish to be as wealthy as millionaires or billionaires. This indeliberately spoils their morality. Secondly, money rules over evil-doing behaviours. Earning money legitimately is a difficult task, but some people want it to be an easy one by conscienceless acts which are likely to be robbing or murdering. They are not alive to the fact that such behaviours can end them up in prison.

In a word, whether money does good or harm, it depends greatly on our perception of it. With money in our hands, we should let it be our servants, not our masters in order to build a better and better world where no crimes exist.

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Originally Posted by JoJo PlayBoy

Our living conditions are gradually improving and thus our need of money for daily life is on the increase. It is obvious that money is very helpful to us, but in addition to its benefits, there are many downsides that it has brought into life.

Firstly, money brings about a lot of advantages as seen from the fact. We use it to equip our houses with furniture, to buy food, clothes and all other things we need to live comfortably. Money is an essential precondition for every student to go to school and for every patient to see a doctor. Moreover, we can use it for charity to help compensate somewhat our unfortunate feeling / sense of duty by making material / financial contributions. Without money, our living conditions would be penurious / poor, and very hard to meet the minimum requirements / basic needs in life, which is simply eating or drinking.

Apart from those advantages, money has brought us numerous downsides. First of all, it makes us grasping. Money is undoubtedly very valuable in life, the more money we earn, the more materials we have. Therefore, people always try their best to earn as much money as possible due to their desire to have a better life. Some, however, do not. They want more money simply because of their rivalries. They wish to be as wealthy as millionaires or billionaires without working for it. This undeliberately / unreasonable attitude to life is contrary to morality. Secondly, money rules over evil-doing behaviours / evil deeds. Earning money legitimately is a difficult task, but some people want it to be an easy one by committing conscienceless / irresponsible acts which are likely to be robbing or murdering. They are not alive to the fact that such behaviours can end them up in prison. / The road of their lives is certainly not to become criminal and end up in prison.

In other words, whether money does us good or harm it depends greatly on our perception of it. With money in our hands, we should let it be our servants, not our masters in order to build a better and better world where no crimes exist. / We should consider the money in our hands to be our servant, not our master in order to build an increasingly better world without crimes.

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february

@februa: Thank you very much! I'm very satisfied with your correction of my essay. I'm a student and I need to improve my English writing skill. Can we make friend? Please add my Y!H nick chat: smart_jonah :-D:-D:-D Nice to meet you!