please help to modify my motivation letter for PhD

[luckyangle]

Hello, I want to apply for a PhD in European countries, like Switzerland, Sweden, Norway, Netherlands and so on. Could you please check my motivation letter and give some comments! Thank you all! I am also grateful to hear some suggestions.

I am an Erasmus Mundus Scholarship holder in European Master in XXXX. Currently, I am in my second year at XXXX University, UK, expected to graduate in June 2012. Now, I am writing to express my motivation and objectives to pursue a PhD position in Biomechanics at the Department of Mechanics.

One year ago, I graduated from XXXX University, which is one of the top ten universities in China. Through my undergraduate study, I have solidly grounded myself in the area of Mechanical Engineering. My academic performance has been always on the top of class, especially in the fields of mathematics and engineering mechanics.

It is my experience of several professional projects in my Bachelor degree that made me develop a love for research. In the second academic year, I have applied for the XXXX University undergraduates' scientific research project with two classmates, entitled ‘signal analysis on cavitation noise and vibration in liquid jet pump based on wavelet transform’. We used MATLAB wavelab to deal with the data of noise and vibration, and finally plot the time-frequency map of the signals, which is useful in optimal control the working conditions of the jet pump. This project brought me into a real world of engineering. From the signals collection and analysis to report writing, I have learned the significance of the dedication and perseverance to be a researcher and a group leader. Furthermore, in the final year, I did the research on fluid-structure interaction of the pipeline system in a nuclear power station, and my degree thesis of this project was awarded with the excellent bachelor thesis by Hubei Province, China.

After graduation from bachelor degree, I realized my dream to study abroad for the master program, funded with Erasmus Mundus Scholarship. I was exciting and grateful that I can involve into an international academic atmosphere to study and communicate with the classmates and teachers. My first institution was XXXX, Spain. During the first semester, I grounded myself solidly in the theories of numerical methods and continuum mechanics, as well as fluid mechanics. Also, the course ‘Programming for Engineers and Scientists’ trained me the programming skills, typically using C++ and MATLAB. Moreover, I did the project that using ANSYS to simulate the behavior of a steel sub-sea pipeline under different load combinations, which made me have a deeper understanding about structural mechanics. Besides, some group works polished my skills of English communication and cooperation, as well as providing me with innovative ideas and an international perspective.

Then I went to the second institution, XXXX University, UK to finish the rest of the two years’ program. Thanks to the solid theory background and programming skills obtained before, I did well in the practical projects in the areas of computational plasticity, computational fluid dynamics and fluid-structure interaction. Specifically, I studied the elasto-plastic behavior of the double-edge-notched specimen, based on 3D von Mises elasto-plastic model. Also, I researched the wing divergence and translation galloping phenomena based on the classic models in fluid-structure interaction. Furthermore, I investigated the wave propagation problems, and compared the difference between Standard Galerkin and Petrov Galerkin finite element methods in solving the convection-diffusion problem in computational fluid dynamics.

At present, I am doing my master degree research project. This project is regarding a-posteriori error estimation of the finite element methods, which is nearly two semesters’ full-time research work. The project goes smoothly now and I believe that after completion I will obtain more professional knowledge and research skills. The experiences of all these individual projects cultivated me the abilities of self-learning, thinking and analyzing independently. More importantly, I found the value of my knowledge and skills, which is using what I have learnt to make the contributions to the engineering even the society as much as I can. This is the source to stimulate me to study and research further with pursuing a PhD program.

Biomechanics is a comprehensive subject, which requires the theory background of continuum mechanics, fluid mechanics, structure mechanics and so on. It is the combination and development of what I am studying now. Therefore, I am very interested the PhD position in the field of XXXX. Based on my solid theory background in mechanics, project experiences and effective communication skills, I think that I can prepare myself best for the research on this PhD project. Also, I am willing to devote myself to be a teaching assistant.

Finally, it is my hope that I can have an opportunity to pursue a PhD and to be professional in the fields I like. I believe that I can face the rigorous challenges posed by PhD research and will try my best to contribute to your projects. I hope your university and research team will provide me with the opportunity to pursue and realize my dream.

Sincerely,

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Looking forward to all your help!
Thank you in advance!

[Gretchenplay]

Hello luckyangle,
I have made a few changes to you letter. Mostly grammatical, a few stylistic. These are of course just suggestions, and as I have no experience in Biomechanics, nor in writing motivation letters, I suggest you ask a peer to look over it also.
Lot's of luck! And I hope this helps.


I am an Erasmus Mundus Scholarship holder, with ina European Masters degree in XXXX. Currently, I am in my second year at XXXX University, UK, and I expected to graduate in June 2012. Now, I am writing to express my motivation and objectives to in pursuing a PhD position in Biomechanics atin the Department of Mechanics.

One year ago I graduated from XXXX University, which is one of the top ten universities in China. Through my undergraduate study, I have solidlyfirmly grounded myself in the area of Mechanical Engineering. My academic performance has always beenonat the top of my class (or well above average), especially in the fields of mathematics and engineering mechanics.

It is my experience of several professional projects in my Bachelor degree that made me develop a love for research. During my Bachelor's degree, I participated in several professional project. Through this experience I developed a love for research. In themy second academic year, I have applied for the XXXX University undergraduates' scientific research project with two classmates. Our project was entitled ‘Signal Analysis on Cavitation Noise and Vibration in a Liquid Jet Pump based on Wavelet Transform(ation)’. We used MATLAB wavelab to deal withanalyse theof noise and vibration data, and finally to plot the time-frequency map of the signals. whichThis is useful in optimal control of the working conditions of the jet pump. This project brought me into athe real world of engineering. From the signals collection and analysis toand report writing, I have learned the significance of the dedication and perseverance needed to be a researcher and a group leader. Furthermore, In my final year, I did the research on fluid-structure interaction of the pipeline system in a nuclear power station. and My degree thesis of this project was awarded with the Excellent Bachelor Thesis award by the Hubei Province in China.

After graduation from bachelor degree, I was able to fulfill realized my dream toof studing the master's program abroad thanks to the Erasmus Mundus Scholarship. I was excited and grateful that I can to be involved into an international academic atmosphere, and to be able to study and communicate with the classmates and teachers. MyThe first institution I attended was XXXX in Spain. During the first semester, I grounded myself solidly infocused on the theories of numerical methods and continuum mechanics, as well as fluid mechanics. Also, From the ‘Programming for Engineers and Scientists’ coursetrained meI learned the programming skills typicallyrequired for using C++ and MATLAB proficiently. I also used ANSYS to simulate the behavior of a steel sub-sea pipeline under different load combinations, gaining a deeper understanding of structural mechanics. Moreover, group work polished my skills in English communication and cooperation, and also provided me with innovative ideas and an international perspective.

Then I then went to the second institution XXXX University in the UK to finish the rest of the two year program. Thanks to the solid background in theory and programming skills I had previously obtained before, I did well in the practical projects in the areas of computational plasticity, computational fluid dynamics and fluid-structure interaction. Specifically, I studied the elasto-plastic behavior of the double-edge-notched specimen, based on the 3D von Mises elasto-plastic model, Also, Iresearched the wing divergence and translation galloping phenomena based on the classic models in fluid-structure interaction, . Furthermore, and I investigated the wave propagation problems, and compared the difference between Standard Galerkin and Petrov Galerkin finite element methods in solving the convection-diffusion problem in computational fluid dynamics.

At present I am doing my master degree research project. This project is regarding concerns a-posteriori error estimation of the finite element methods, whichand iswill take nearly two semesters’ of full-time research work. The project goes is going smoothly now and I believe that after completion I will have obtained more professional knowledge and even better research skills.

The experiences of all these individual projects has cultivated in me the abilities of to self-learn, think, and analyse independently. More importantly, I have foundlearnt the value of my own knowledge and skills, which is using what I have learntI hope to use to make the valuable contributions to the the field of engineering, and to society itself. This is thea source toof constant stimulationinspiration to me that I hope to study and research further with pursue further through the PhD program.

Biomechanics is a comprehensive subject, which requiring thea firm theoretical background of in continuum mechanics, fluid mechanics, and structure mechanics and so onto say the least. It is the combination and development of what I am studying now, . Therefore, and why I am very interested the PhD position in the field of XXXX. Based on my solid theory background in mechanics, project experiences and effective communication skills, I think that I can prepare myself bestam well prepared for the research on this PhD project requires. I am also willing to devote myself to be a teaching assistant.

Finally, it is my hope that I can have an opportunity to pursue a PhD, and to become professional in the fields I am interested in. I believe that I can face the rigorous challenges posed by PhD research, and will try my best to contribute to your projects. I hope your university and research team will provide me with the opportunity to pursue and realize my dream.

Sincerely,