Three paragraphs describing three scenes

[khanhhung2512]

Hi everyone.
I'm beginning to study writing, so would anyone please check three following paragraphs for me?

There is a table with some objects on it. The 
objects are for the office or for school. There 
is a pencil, an eraser, a ruler, a pencil 
sharpener and some paper.

This is a cocktail party with lots of people. 
There are three men and three women. 
They're all friends and are having fun. There 
are talking and laughing a lot. They're 
clinking their glasses and saying 'Cheers!'.

There are three women in the street. They 
are thin and pretty. There is a blond woman, 
a woman with fair hair and a woman with 
brown hair. They look happy. They have 
shopping bags.

Thanks very much!

[februar]

[QUOTE=khanhhung2512;835747]Hi everyone.
I'm beginning to study writing, so would anyone please check three following paragraphs for me?
[code]
There is a table with some objects on it. The
objects are for the office or for school. There
is a pencil, an eraser, a ruler, a pencil
sharpener and some paper.

This is a cocktail party with lots of people.
There are three men and three women.
They're They are all friends and are having fun. They
are talking and laughing a lot. They're They are
clinking their glasses and saying 'Cheers!'.

There are three women in the street.
They are thin and pretty. (Or: perhaps better “slim” – “thin” means people who might weigh less than they should)
There is a blond woman,
a woman with fair hair and a woman with
brown hair. They look happy. They have are carrying
shopping bags.

februar, no teacher

[khanhhung2512]

[QUOTE=februar;836070]

Hi everyone.
I'm beginning to study writing, so would anyone please check three following paragraphs for me?
[code]
There is a table with some objects on it. The
objects are for the office or for school. There
is a pencil, an eraser, a ruler, a pencil
sharpener and some paper.

This is a cocktail party with lots of people.
There are three men and three women.
They're They are all friends and are having fun. They
are talking and laughing a lot. They're They are
clinking their glasses and saying 'Cheers!'.

There are three women in the street.
They are thin and pretty. (Or: perhaps better “slim” – “thin” means people who might weigh less than they should)
There is a blond woman,
a woman with fair hair and a woman with
brown hair. They look happy. They have are carrying
shopping bags.

februar, no teacher

There is a green wavy underline (Microsoft Office 2010 SP1) under the combination ’. in ‘Cheers!’., but I don't understand why.

[Gillnetter]

[QUOTE=februar;836070]

Hi everyone.
I'm beginning to study writing, so would anyone please check three following paragraphs for me?
[code]
There is a table with some objects on it. The
objects are for the office or for school. There
is a pencil, an eraser, a ruler, a pencil
sharpener and some paper.

This is a cocktail party with lots of people.
There are three men and three women.
They're They are (They're is an acceptable contraction) all friends and are having fun. They
are talking and laughing a lot. They're They are (They're)
clinking their glasses and saying 'Cheers!'.

There are three women in the street.
They are thin and pretty. (Or: perhaps better “slim” – “thin” means people who might weigh less than they should)
There is a blond woman,
a woman with fair hair and a woman with
brown hair. They look happy. They have are carrying (To have is not the same as to carry. You changed the meaning by striking "have" and replacing it with "are carrying". I can have an automobile but this ownership does not indicate that I am carrying the automobile. In this case it is acceptable to say that they "have" shopping bags and the sense is that they are either carrying the bags or that the bags belong to them.)
shopping bags.

februar, no teacher

Gil

[februar]

[QUOTE=Gillnetter;836245]

Gil

There are three men and three women.
They're They are (They're is an acceptable contraction) all friends and are having fun. They
are talking and laughing a lot. They're They are (They're)

You are right, “they’re” is an acceptable form, but the paragraph begins with the long form, so I think it should be continued with the long one – either the long form or the short one, but not both of them.

They "have" are carrying (To have is not the same as to carry. You changed the meaning by striking "have" and replacing it with "are carrying". I can have an automobile but this ownership does not indicate that I am carrying the automobile. In this case it is acceptable to say that they "have" shopping bags and the sense is that they are either carrying the bags or that the bags belong to them.)
shopping bags.


Concerning the shopping bags, Sorry, I shouldn’t have changed this sentence. But If I form a mental picture of the women in the street, it becomes so obvious to me that they are carrying the bags. That’s why I marked the words are carrying green not red.