,,Steve Jobs, known as an inventor and ex-CEO of Apple, first invented
anthe ipod that had lots of functions like a calling system and a music device. It was really asensational goods, so he earned a lot of money. After that, his successive inventions made people realize the important of acreative thinking. In other words, being different from others makes us successful.
The clause, "known as an inventor and ex-CEO of Apple", is extra information. The sentence could function without this clause, "Steve Jobs first invented the ipod...". When you see such a clause, set it apart from the rest of the sentence by commas. "...really a sensational goods" is not correct. You could write, "...was really a sensational product...". "...his successive invention..." means that there was only one more invention, use "inventions" to indicate that there were more than one.
I am not a native speaker but I want to improve English skills so please don't
hegitagehesitate to point out my problems!! Thank you so much for your time and help in advance!
- For Teachers