#1  
Old 28-Jul-2006, 06:42
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Default Sentences

Would somebody please help me with my paragraph?


Pharmaceutical promotion provides information about drugs to physicians. In Australia, spending on drug promotion has reached between $ 1.3 billion to $ 2.0 billion per year. The information in drug promotion is used by companies to create awareness about their products to the prescribers. In 2004, withdrawal of an arthritis drug refocoxib from the market due to safety reason has highlighted the need for heath professionals to access to complete and accurate information from the pharmaceutical companies. Promotion with inaccurate information was continued for four of five years on the market despite evidence from a large-scale randomised control study have shown increased in cardiac risks . Graham et al. reported that about 88,000 to 139,000 extra heart attacks and sudden cardiac death in the US were attributed to refocoxib in five years in the market. Besides this , the information provided by companies should be reliable because it may have an impact on physicians prescribing behaviour.



Regards,

Dean
  #2  
Old 29-Jul-2006, 18:42
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Default Re: Sentences

has reached between $ 1.3 billion to $ 2.0 billion- have you thought of deleting 'between'?
to access to complete- to have...
due to safety reason- for safety reasons
was continued- I'd use the active
on the market- is it necessary? promotion implies this to me
study have shown- which showed an increase
Graham et al- I'm not sure of the referencing system, but should there be a date?
cardiac death- deaths
in the market- on
physicians prescribing- physicians' prescribing
Besides this- this doesn'tt reallly work for me- it makes the sentence look a bit tacked-on and not really a part. How abou
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