Please check my self evaluation memo

[bbmak]

Hi:

I am writing a self evaluation of a presentation that I have done last week.

In the presentation, i am teaching people how to write an effective application letter(cover letter).

Can you please check my grammar? If you have anything to add or suggest to make the memo much more better, please feel free to do it.

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Presentation topic

On July 31st, while completing a presentation on how to write an application letter, I discussed the purpose, need, and proper methods for composing an effective application letter. In the presentation, I provided three easy steps, the ABC method, to compose an application letter such as addressing and opening, body, and closing. In addition, I also provided some convenient methods for writing an effective application letter such as the online tools of hotjobs.com and monster.com.

Self-Evaluation

Having a smile on my face, dressing formally, I did a great job on my presentation. My visual aids were catchy and comprehensible since the presentation included art, graphics, photos and a fancy template to illustrate ideas. I also organized my presentation very well, giving a lot of good examples on how to write an effective application letter, categorizing three steps to write an application letter, including all the detailed information of how to compose an application letter. However, I was a bit nervous in the beginning when I was delivering the presentation. I felt butterflies in my stomach. I must admit that I had a stomachache problem. For some reason, I suffer from stomachache every time when I present.

Class Feedback

The class’s feedback was very helpful to me because they actually pointed out my weakness. Most of the groups said one common thing to me. When I was delivering the presentation in the class, I was talking too fast and not having enough eye contact with the audience. They suggested to me that I need to relax, talk slower, and keep eye contact with the audience because I seemed like I was reciting. Most of the groups also said that I had good visual aids and well-organized presentation, and I agree with them because I have devoted a lot of time to organization and visual aids.

Communication principles

I expect to learn some guidelines for delivering a client-focused presentation and elements that I can use within my presentation to effectively support the messages and ideas. Needing to learn how to keep good eye contact with the audience, I expect to learn how to use body language and other delivery techniques to deliver an effective presentation and the techniques for reducing nervousness, as well as pitfalls to avoid during presentations. Pronunciation is another thing that I need to improve because I often swallow words when nervousness strikes me. Like the word “application,” I will pronounce as “app-tion.” I want to be able to manage my nervousness during my presentation, so I can deliver it effectively to people.

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Thank you so much for reading my self evaluation memo

[Tdol]

Having a smile on my face, dressing formally,
These phrases don't work well formally me. The 'having a smile' suggests that the smile was stuck on fopr the entire presentation, and the link to the c lothes adds to this effect. It doesn't give me a very positive picture.