#1  
Old 09-Oct-2006, 13:57
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Exclamation What do you think of my writting?

Im sure I made thousands of mistakes. Would you help me??
The writting is the experience of a girl in a ball.

As soon as my cousins and I arrived, we dashed to the ladies room where a large number of girls were patting their hair and putting on some make up. Suddenly, we were given our programmes. At first, I felt unsure, was I supossed to have one, or not? However, there was no time to ask. Again we dashed to the drill hall because the ball was about to begin.

The girls were in one side of the doors, while the men stayed in the opposite side. Later on, they came towards us, gently took our programmes and wrote something down. Among them there was an old fat man who did the same thing with my programme and then, disappeared in the crowd. After that, I had two dancing partners who were really kind; although, I thought it was strange that they both asked me the same questions and both felt quiet surprised when I mentioned that I had never been to a ball before.

The fat man was my third partner. He looked rather shabby and older that the rest of the men. While we were dancing he explained to me that he had been going to balls for thirty years. Then, he made such a rude comment that I decided to stop dancing. I felt really miserable. When my next partner appeared, I agreed to dance although I just wanted to go home, but as we glided over the floor, the joy came back and I was more delighted than ever to be where I was.


TAHNK YOU! (:
  #2  
Old 10-Oct-2006, 06:15
Editor, UsingEnglish.com
 
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Default Re: What do you think of my writting?

supossed - spelling
in one side- on
fat man who did - comma
quiet surprised- quite
  #3  
Old 17-Oct-2006, 16:06
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Default Re: What do you think of my writting?

Oh, Thanks for your comments on my writing!

My dsl conecction wasnt working and I couldnt check the forum in order to give thanks. Im sorry! I feel really ashamed.

Thanks again for taking time to read my writing! (:
  #4  
Old 18-Oct-2006, 07:54
Editor, UsingEnglish.com
 
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Default Re: What do you think of my writting?

You're welcome, Tangerine.
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