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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 13-Sep-2007, 09:38
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Default the last help!

I'm taking the exam on Monday so today and tomorrow I'll post my last writings. Thank you everybody who has helped me to correct my grammar, vocabulary and style. Please help me whith the last effort.. if I don't pass next year I'll try harder during the year with a personal teacher so I won't bother you any more. Thank you!




Mini story about the summer:
It has been a fantastic holiday. Initially I was not very enthusiastic about spending the whole summer out of home but it has been a really exciting experience.

Firstly, I went to Turin in order to visit Guile, that friend I knew when I went to Oxford three years ago. We knew many nice people there and learnt a bit of Italian.

I then moved to Spain again in order to visit my relatives in Leon and Cancers. I enjoyed these days a lot and I met some friends from my childhood too.

Right now I am finishing my holidays. Swimming pools are closed so I usually study English in the morning (I have my exam on Monday) and go to the cinema in the afternoon.

In the end of the holiday we will hold on a party in Aura’s home. There may be many people but we will be a bit sad because we have to say goodbye each other after a whole summer together.


Tourist guide: Alcalá

Alcalá de Henares was important long before the University has existed. It was and important village under the power or Rome. At that time the town was named as Complutum. The earth works of that village are still stand and you can pay for a tour in order to visit them.

Then, Cisneros founded the university building at the end of 15th century. This building was working for much time although the university was moved to Madrid receiving the name of Complutense. It was not until 19th century when a new university was founded in Alcalá using Cisneros’ building as the currently main location. It can be visited during all the week either in Spanish or in English.

Furthermore, Cervantes was born in Alcalá so it is available a visit of a whole day which takes you from Madrid to Alcalá in the Cervantes’ train. If you join to this visit they will show you Cervantes’ home as well as the place where this famous writer was christened which is located just in front of Cervantes’ square where the city council is placed.
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old 13-Sep-2007, 23:54
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Default Re: the last help!

Quote:
Originally Posted by venerupis View Post
I'm taking the exam on Monday so today and tomorrow I'll post my last writings. Thank you everybody who has helped me to correct my grammar, vocabulary and style. Please help me whith the last effort.. if I don't pass next year I'll try harder during the year with a personal teacher so I won't bother you any more. Thank you!




Mini story about the summer:
It has been a fantastic holiday. Initially I was not very enthusiastic about spending the whole summer out of [away from] home but it has been a really exciting experience.

Firstly, I went to Turin in order to visit Guile, that friend I knew [made] when I went to Oxford three years ago. We knew many nice people there [Is this Turin or Oxford? It is not clear] and learnt a bit of Italian.

I then moved to Spain again in order to visit my relatives in Leon and Cancers. I enjoyed these days a lot and I met some friends from my childhood too.

Right now I am finishing my holidays. Swimming pools are closed so I usually study English in the morning (I have my exam on Monday) and go to the cinema in the afternoon.

In the end of the holiday we will hold on a party in Aura’s home. There may be many people but we will be a bit sad because we have to say goodbye each other after a whole summer together.


Tourist guide: Alcalá

Alcalá de Henares was important long before the University has [delete - not required] existed. It was and important village under the power or Rome. At that time the town was named as [named/called] Complutum. The earthworks of that village are still stand and you can pay for a tour in order to visit them.

Then Cisneros founded the university building at the end of 15th century. This building was working for much time [existed for a long time/was used for a long time] although [until/before] the university was moved to Madrid receiving the name of Complutense. It was not until the 19th century that a new university was founded in Alcalá using Cisneros’s building as the currently main location [delete - not necessary]. It can be visited during all the week either in Spanish or in English.

Furthermore, Cervantes was born in Alcalá. so it is available a visit of [There is a tour that lasts] a whole day, which takes you from Madrid to Alcalá in the Cervantes train. If you join this visit they will show you Cervantes’s home as well as the place where this famous writer was christened, which is located just in front of Cervantes Square where the city council [building] is placed[situated].
No bother.

The first is more fluent than the second.
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Old 14-Sep-2007, 00:17
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Default Re: the last help!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anglika View Post
.Firstly, I went to Turin in order to visit Guile, that friend I knew [made] when I went to Oxford three years ago. We knew many nice people there [Is this Turin or Oxford? It is not clear] and learnt a bit of Italian.
I think she/he is talking about Turin, as following it's written that "learnt a bit of Italian.If so, I think the correct sentence is supposed to be "We met many nice people there".

If I am wrong, I am sorry Anglika for being meddlesome.
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Old 14-Sep-2007, 00:44
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Default Re: the last help!

Quote:
Originally Posted by LwyrFirat View Post
I think she/he is talking about Turin, as following it's written that "learnt a bit of Italian.If so, I think the correct sentence is supposed to be "We met many nice people there".

If I am wrong, I am sorry Anglika for being meddlesome.
I think you are right, but I was hoping venerupis would work that out.
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Old 14-Sep-2007, 14:14
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Wink Re: the last help!

Thank you for everything but I would be happy if you could help me with some doubts about it.

So when you start a friendship with somebody you "make a friend". I think I've never heard it like that so it sounds a bit strange to? me.

I completely agree that the second is less fluent as I wrote it very fast as I was almost leaving... but I did really want to try something out.
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Old 14-Sep-2007, 19:11
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Default Re: the last help!

Yes, when you find a new friend, you "make a friend".

The second passage is not bad, just shows your hurry.
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