Forum newsfeeds
Forum Newsfeeds


Sites for Teachers

Sites for Teachers


Go Back   UsingEnglish.com ESL Forum > Learning English > Editing & Writing Topics

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 29-Jan-2008, 02:49
Newbie
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Country: Iran
Posts: 2
Current Location: Tehran
First Language: Farsi
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
mkmfAm is on a distinguished road
Arrow Correct my essay

hello every one,
as you can guess from thesis statement this combination is about traveling alone . please help me to improve it more formal !.


this article will give you my personal ideas about travellin alone . it would be of use when you get stuck on a difficult situation .and also it informs you if you do not know advantages and disadvantages of traveling alone .so after reading this article you khow how to confront with this dilemma : go travel alone or by my acquaintances ? i have tryed to give fruitful information particularly to some one who has not ever have these experiences .

one thing that inspired traveling alone than travel with group of peaple is that you are able to feel tranquility . after couple of mounths every one needs to have some days off in order to relax . becouse there is no rule to restrict and foce you to obey them. so you have freedom to do what ever you want and able to consentraite on real life in order to make it beter that before .

on the other hand , traveling alone might couse quite a bit problems .
for example ,let's imagine you have lost one of your suitcases in an airport .as a result ,you have to go back for your suitcase becouse there is no other way and no one to help you . therefor ,the first trait you should have is organization and the secound that i can not renounce is self-reliant . these two traites at least help you to the point that you can solve common problems .

In conclusion, according to my previouse experiences , it is hard to say that traveling alone is good or not .punch line , i belive that it directly depends on persnality . some People tend to travel alone . but, if i want to take a trip , i will go by group of my freinds .
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 29-Jan-2008, 03:01
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Country: USA
Posts: 1,265
Current Location: Oakland County, Michigan
First Language: American English
Thanks: 11
Thanked 344 Times in 336 Posts
susiedqq is just really nicesusiedqq is just really nicesusiedqq is just really nicesusiedqq is just really nice
Default Re: Correct my essay

This article will give you my personal ideas about traveling alone. It could be of use when you face difficult situations or if you do not know the advantages and disadvantages of traveling alone. After reading this article you will know how to confront with the dilemma of whether to travel alone or with acquaintances. I have tried to give fruitful information, particularly to someone who has never had these experiences .

One thing that inspires people to travel alone rather than with with group of people is that you are able to feel more relaxed. After a couple of months, everyone needs to have some days off from work. There are no rule to restrict and force you to obey when you travel, so you have freedom to do whatever you want and are able to concentrate on real life in order to make it better than before .

On the other hand, traveling alone might cause problems. For example, let's imagine you have lost one of your suitcases in an airport. As a result, you have to go back to the counter for your suitcase because there is no other option and no one to help you. Therefore,the first trait you should have is organization and the second is self-reliancy. These two traits will help you solve common problems.

In conclusion, according to my experiences, it is hard to say that traveling alone is good or not. I believe that it directly depends on personality. Some people tend to travel alone often. But, if i want to take a trip, I travel with a group of my friends.

__________________________________________________ __

You need to explain how "self-reliancy" helps when traveling alone.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
traveling alone

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Please correct me with the essay belly_ttt Editing & Writing Topics 3 04-Jan-2008 18:21
environmental essay for CPE, please correct Greekgirl Editing & Writing Topics 11 06-Dec-2007 02:19
Another IELTS essay, could you please correct? mesh2005 Editing & Writing Topics 2 16-Aug-2007 05:50
Please correct my essay! mariadallas Ask a Teacher 1 10-Jul-2006 08:05
Would you correct this new essay? aleycris Ask a Teacher 4 29-Oct-2003 15:41


New To Site? Need Help?

All times are GMT. The time now is 02:49.


vBulletin, Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.2.0 RC5
Copyright © 2002 - 2008 UsingEnglish.com