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Old 04-Mar-2008, 07:36
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Default Another episode at the library

Quote:
Well, I got into a little situation today. I was at the 4th floor of Morissette library working on my assignment as usual. It was about 12am and there weren’t that many people around. This one guy and a girl, who were sitting on my opposite side, started whispering each other and I needed to concentrate so I asked them if they could stop whispering. As mentioned in the last post, the 4th floor of Morissette library is reserved for silence study and I was merely asking for what everyone in that area was entitled to: silence. Then the guy made that “what the f$#@ is your problem” face and got very confrontational. He was first like “do you know there’s another area upstairs?”

Well, I do, you’re talking about the one on the 5th floor, the laxer study hall where you’re allowed to whisper and talk all you want. You’re suggesting I should go there but it’s you, mister, who should pack up your stuff and go since you’re the one whispering and making noise. Well, that’s pretty much what went on in my head, but I just said “you’re supposed be silent here, you’re not supposed to be talking. Look at the postings on the walls. It says ‘silence’.” Then he got even more aggressive and spewed out stuff like “Don’t try to teach me,” and when I sighed in frustration, he was like “C’mon!” with the hand gesture “Come and fight me.”

By then my heart was beating very fast and my muscles trembling. Yes, I don’t want to admit, but part of me was scared. But at the same time I couldn’t wait to jump at him, punch him and rip him apart; I didn’t want to mix another word with him because the familiar sensation of fight-or-flight response elevated the more I argued with him. I wanted to get rid of the threat before my eyesight immediately, be it fight or flight.

I chose the latter. I gave him another frustrated sigh and sat back down. I had no other choice. The guy was about my size and looked cut but not more so than I was. If I actually fought him I probably would’ve twisted his arm apart. At the very least, I knew he wasn’t strong enough to substantially hurt me. However, I’m studying my butts off and I’m getting the highest amount of scholarship the university offers. I don’t have a record and I’ve never gotten into trouble throughout my 24 years of life. If I keep up with my studies I could probably become someone of substantial social status, such as university professor. I simply had too much at stake and butchering him just for a moment of delightful relief was not going to help me in the long run. After that, I just kept on with my assignment and the guy, after some whispering with his girl, fell silent. The girl must have told him not to make any more trouble.

If the story ended here that wouldn’t be the best resolution, but it gets better. An hour after the episode, I decided to call it a day. I went downstairs and told the people at the info desk about what happened, just to see if I could call security in case I run into similar situations. I didn’t expect to get much out of it, perhaps a phone number to reach the info desk should such situations recur. The girl at the info desk seemingly became sympathetic with what I had put up with and told me I should report it. She then had an older guy at the office beside call the security / police and I was told to wait. See, I wasn’t quite expecting this, but I can’t say I wasn’t pleased. Soon after, two officers arrived and I described the situation. I wanted to go up with them but they told me that for complaints like this it’d be better if I wasn’t there. I couldn’t quite describe where I had been because I’m terrible with directions but gave them the approximate location.

I don’t know what happened after that. I don’t even know if the officers have managed to find them. But hey, I now know what to do when those misbegotten @#$%tards give me hard time: go downstairs right away and sic security on them!
Could you check for grammar errors and tense usage, and make suggestions to improve this writing? I'd really appreciate your work. (I know some expressions are over the top, but I know the pragmatics and would filter those out depending on the intended audience. For now, it's only my friends who are going to read this and they love those OTT expessions)

- HKB

Last edited by HaraKiriBlade; 04-Mar-2008 at 07:52.
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Old 04-Mar-2008, 23:03
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Default Re: Another episode at the library

Well, I got into a little situation today. I was at the 4th floor of Morissette Library working on my assignment as usual. It was about 12am [Truly? That is midnight>>Midday is 12 p.m. ((post meridian))] and there weren’t that many people around. This one [you don't really need this] guy and a girl, who were sitting on my opposite side [opposite me], started whispering to each other and I needed to concentrate so I asked them if they could stop whispering. As mentioned in the last post, the 4th floor of Morissette Library is reserved for silence study and I was merely asking for what everyone in that area was entitled to: silence. Then the guy made that “what the f$#@ is your problem” face and got very confrontational. He was first like “do you know there’s another area upstairs?”

Well, I do, you’re talking about the one on the 5th floor, the laxer study hall where you’re allowed to whisper and talk all you want. You’re suggesting I should go there but it’s you, mister, who should pack up your stuff and go since you’re the one whispering and making a noise. Well, that’s pretty much what went on in my head, but I just said,You’re supposed be silent here, you’re not supposed to be talking. Look at the poster/notice on the walls. It says ‘silence’.” Then he got even more aggressive and spewed out stuff like “Don’t try to teach me,” and when I sighed in frustration, he was like “C’mon!” with the hand gesture “Come and fight me.”

By then my heart was beating very fast and my muscles trembling. Yes, I don’t want to admit it, but part of me was scared. But at the same time I couldn’t wait to jump at him, punch him and rip him apart; I didn’t want to mix another word with him because the familiar sensation of fight-or-flight response elevated [grew] the more I argued with him. I wanted to get rid of the threat before my eyesight [what do you mean? "confronting me" might be better, or just omit it altogether] immediately, be it fight or flight.

I chose the latter. I gave him another frustrated sigh and sat back down. I had no other choice. The guy was about my size and looked cut but not more so than I was. If I actually fought him I probably would’ve twisted his arm apart. At the very least, I knew he wasn’t strong enough to substantially hurt me. However, I’m studying my butt off and I’m getting the highest amount of scholarship the university offers. I don’t have a record and I’ve never gotten into trouble throughout my 24 years of life. If I keep up with my studies I could probably become someone of substantial social status, such as university professor. I simply had too much at stake and butchering him just for a moment of delightful relief was not going to help me in the long run. After that, I just kept on with my assignment and the guy, after some whispering with his girl, fell silent. The girl must have told him not to make any more trouble.

If the story ended here, that wouldn’t be the best resolution, but it gets better. An hour after the episode, I decided to call it a day. I went downstairs and told the people at the info desk about what happened, just to see if I could call Security in case I run into similar situations. I didn’t expect to get much out of it, perhaps a phone number to reach the info desk should such situations recur. The girl at the info desk seemingly became sympathetic with what I had put up with and told me I should report it. She then had an older guy at the office call the Security / police and I was told to wait. See, I wasn’t quite expecting this, but I can’t say I wasn’t pleased. Soon after, two officers arrived and I described the situation. I wanted to go up with them but they told me that for complaints like this it’d be better if I wasn’t there. I couldn’t quite describe where I had been because I’m terrible with directions but gave them the approximate location.

I don’t know what happened after that. I don’t even know if the officers have [omit] managed to find them. But hey, I now know what to do when those misbegotten @#$%tards give me a hard time: go downstairs right away and sic Security on them!

Could you check for grammar errors and tense usage, and make suggestions to improve this writing? I'd really appreciate your work. (I know some expressions are over the top, but I know the pragmatics and would filter those out depending on the intended audience. For now, it's only my friends who are going to read this and they love those OTT expessions)
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Old 04-Mar-2008, 23:24
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Default Re: Another episode at the library

I got into a little situation today: I was on the 4th floor of the Morissette Library working on my assignment, as usual. It was about midnight so there weren’t that many people around. This couple, one guy and a girl, who were sitting across from me, started whispering to each other. I needed to concentrate so I asked them if they could stop whispering. As mentioned before, the 4th floor of Morissette Library is reserved for silence study. I was there merely expecting what everyone in that area was entitled to: silence. The the guy then made one of those “what the f$#@ is your problem?” faces and got very confrontational.

Here's what happended next: He was, like, "do you know there’s another area upstairs?” In my head, I answered, "Well, yes, I do - you’re talking about the one on the 5th floor, the laxer study hall where you’re allowed to whisper and talk all you want. You’re suggesting I should go there. But it’s you, mister, who should pack up your stuff and go since you’re the one whispering and making noise." Instead, I just said “You’re supposed be silent here; you’re not supposed to be talking. Look at the postings on the walls. It says ‘silence’.” Then he got even more aggressive and spewed out stuff like “Don’t try to teach me,” and when I sighed in frustration, he was like “C’mon!” using hand gestures that meant, “Come on, and fight.”

By then my heart was beating very fast and my muscles trembling. Yes, I don’t want to admit, but part of me was scared. But at the same time I couldn’t wait to jump at him, punch him and rip him apart. I didn’t want to mix another word with him because the familiar sensation of fight-or-flight response elevated the more I argued with him. I wanted to get rid of the threat before my eyesight immediately, be it fight or flight. I chose the latter. I gave out another frustrated sigh and sat back down. I had no other choice.

This guy was about my size and looked cut, but not that much more so than I. If I actually fought him, I probably would’ve twisted his arm apart. At the very least, I knew he wasn’t strong enough to substantially hurt me. However, I got to thinking: I’m studying my butt off and I’m getting the highest level scholarship the university offers. I don’t have a record and I’ve never gotten into trouble throughout my 24 years of life. If I keep up with my studies I could probably become someone of substantial social status, such as a university professor. I simply had too much at stake. Butchering him just for a moment of delightful relief was not going to help me in the long run.

Afterwards, I just turned back to my assignment and the guy - after some whispering with his girl - fell silent. Maybe the girlfriend cautioned him not to make any more trouble.

If the story ended here that wouldn’t be the best resolution, but it gets better. An hour after the episode, I decided to call it a day. I went downstairs and told the people at the info desk about what happened. I wanted to know if I could call security in case I run into a this situation again. I didn’t expect to get much out of it, perhaps a phone number to reach the info desk, should such situations recur. The girl at the info desk seemingly was sympathetic with what I had gone through, and told me I should report it. She then told an older guy at the next office to call the security / police and I was told to wait.

I wasn’t quite expecting this, but I can’t say I wasn’t pleased. Soon after, two officers arrived and I described the situation. I wanted to go up with them but they told me that for complaints like this, it’d be better if I wasn’t there. I couldn’t quite describe where I had been because I’m terrible with directions but gave them the approximate location.

I don’t know what happened after that. I don’t even know if the officers have managed to find the guy. But hey, I now know what to do when some misbegotten @#$%tard gives me hard time: go downstairs right away and sick security on them!
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  #4 (permalink)  
Old 05-Mar-2008, 05:34
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Default Re: Another episode at the library

before my eyesight: I figured you'd catch me on that, but it sounded cool. What I meant was that the guy was "the threat that's in my view / sight, that I can see"
I want to say that he's a threat in my sight: 'the threat confronting me' makes sense, but that's not the stylistic choice I want to make. Is "the threat in my view" ok? or do you have other suggestions?

'midnight,' of course! how could I have forgotten the word?? (yeah I usually study at the library til 2am... too many distractions at home)

- HKB

Last edited by HaraKiriBlade; 05-Mar-2008 at 05:42.
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Old 05-Mar-2008, 10:41
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Default Re: Another episode at the library

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Originally Posted by HaraKiriBlade View Post
before my eyesight: I figured you'd catch me on that, but it sounded cool. What I meant was that the guy was "the threat that's in my view / sight, that I can see"
I want to say that he's a threat in my sight: 'the threat confronting me' makes sense, but that's not the stylistic choice I want to make. Is "the threat in my view" ok? or do you have other suggestions? Several options: In my view/In my opinion/In my eyes, the guy is a threat and I want to get rid of it/him.

'midnight,' of course! how could I have forgotten the word?? (yeah I usually study at the library til 2am... too many distractions at home)

- HKB
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