College Degree

[Unregistered]

1. People attend college or university for many different reasons, why do you think people attend college to university ? Support your answer.

College Degree (367)

People attend college for many varied reasons. To be compensated with an enormous amount of money, to gain interesting social experiences and for self fulfillment. Doctors, Lawyers, Nurses, Pharmacist and Accountants are some of the profession that requires to attend colleges or universities to earn a degree. College degree is the key to the advancement of one’s success.

Life at present is so competitive. Food, shelter and clothing are so expensive. Job markets prefer to hire people with degrees rather than people that have not been to college or universities. Salaries that are offered to professionals are twice higher than to people without a degree. Life is good to people with a degree in college. With the money that a doctor will earned, he can afford to buy the things he likes and he could tour around the world, without any bit of worries that he will run out of money. His profession is an assurance that he will have continued supply of money coming into his pocket.

Life experiences and skills that were earned in college are equally as important as what is learned in the classroom. Most of the students that went to college stayed in a dormitory or in an apartment that is away from home. Being away from home, it teaches an individual to be accountable of his own actions.

Professionals are considered the cream of the crop in the society. They are often put in the position of leadership and are often subjects the holder of elite status. Elite people are given better seats in theaters and stadiums, their presence in social functions are always being acknowledged. It can be idealized as an education geared to producing an individual capable of thinking at an intellectual level more advanced than the general population, consisting of diverse philosophical ideals and theories in order to enable the elite to logically evaluate situations. Their opinions are always consulted and valued.

In summary, to attain college degree requires a vast amount of funds, time and effort. While an individual work their fingers to the bones during college years. The fruit that will be harvested afterwards will be a very rewarding career for the future of an individual.

[RonBee]

People attend college for many varied reasons.

Say:

People attend college for many reasons.

or

People attend college for various reasons.

To be compensated with an enormous amount of money,

People attend college so they can get a job and make a lot of money.

or

People attend college so they can get a job that pays a lot.

[RonBee]

A college degree is required for a person to become a doctor, lawyer, nurse or pharmacist.

[RonBee]

Having a college degree is the key to success.

[happy88805]

Hi Ron Bee thanks for prompt reply, but I have some more questions.
I have doubts on some of these few lines.

Will you correct my entire essay? I will appreciate it very much. Thank you!

College degree is my essay.

[RonBee]

Life at present is so competitive. Food, shelter and clothing are so expensive. Job markets prefer to hire people with degrees rather than people that have not been to college or universities. Salaries that are offered to professionals are twice higher than to people without a degree. Life is good to people with a degree in college. With the money that a doctor will earned, he can afford to buy the things he likes and he could tour around the world, without any bit of worries that he will run out of money. His profession is an assurance that he will have continued supply of money coming into his pocket.

Life at present is competitive, but when has it ever not been? Food, shelter and clothing are expensive compared to what? Job markets don't hire people. Employers hire people. Where are your sources? (Say twice as high as.)

Stay on topic. Provide sources to back up your statements.

You need to reread the essay to find what should be rewritten.

The format is good.


After you revise the essay, post it here.

[happy88805]

Thanks in advance!

Hi Ron my essay test requires a great amount of advance vocabulary and idiomatic expression, I hope you can help me.

1. People attend college or university for many different reasons, why do you think people attend college to university ? Support your answer.

College Degree (367)

People attend college for various reasons. People attend college so they can get a job that pays a lot, to gain interesting social experiences and for self fulfillment through independence and self-confidence. A college degree is required for a person to become a doctor, lawyer, nurse or pharmacist. College degree is the key to success.

Life at nowadays is so competitive when it comes to be hired for a job. The job market prefers to hire people with degrees rather than people that have not been to college or universities. Salaries that are offered to professionals are twice higher than to people without a degree. Life is good to people with a degree in college. With the money that a doctor will earned, he can afford to buy the things he likes and he could tour around the world, without any bit of worries that he will run out of money. His profession is an assurance that he will have continued supply of money coming into his pocket.

Life experiences and skills that were earned in college are equally as important as what is learned in the classroom. Most of the students that went to college stayed in a dormitory or in an apartment that is away from home. Being away from home, it teaches an individual to be accountable of his own actions in terms of being independent.

Professionals are considered the cream of the crop in society. They are often put in the position of leadership and are often subjects the holder of elite status. Elite people are given better seats in theaters and stadiums, their presence in social functions are always being acknowledged. It can be idealized as an education geared to producing an individual capable of thinking at an intellectual level more advanced than the general population, consisting of diverse philosophical ideals and theories in order to enable the elite to logically evaluate situations. Their opinions are always consulted and valued.

In summary, to attain college degree requires a vast amount of funds, time and effort. While an individual work their fingers to the bones during college years. The fruit that will be harvested afterwards will be a very rewarding career for the future of an individual.

[RonBee]

I should be in bed, but I'm up posting instead.


Suggestions, corrections inside quoted text in red. Otherwise they are in blue (outside quoted text).

People attend college for various reasons. People attend college so they can get a job that pays a lot, to gain interesting social experiences and for self fulfillment through independence and self-confidence. A college degree is required for a person to become a doctor, lawyer, nurse or pharmacist. A college degree is the key to success.

The job market is very competitive. Employers prefer to hire people with degrees rather than people that have not been to college or university. Salaries that are offered to professionals are twice as high as those offered to people without degrees.. Life is good to people with college degrees. With the money that a doctor earns he can afford to buy the things he likes and he need never have any money worries.

Do you have a source for the statement about salaries?