Go Back   UsingEnglish.com ESL Forum > Learning English > Editing & Writing Topics

Like Tree4Likes

Closed Thread
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old 26-Dec-2008, 08:47
Newbie
Threadstarter  
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 8
Member Type: Student or Learner
Default Re: this is my rambling writing about my cats

My final question, do you really fully understand all of my ideas and descriptions in the writing? Is there any word or sentence that is too obscure?

Thank you very much?
  #12  
Old 26-Dec-2008, 10:15
RonBee's Avatar
Moderator
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 16,539
Home Country: United States
Native Language: American English
Current Location: United States
Member Type: Other
Default Re: this is my rambling writing about my cats

Quote:
Originally Posted by webdweller View Post
:D Well can you ask a little more clearly? Actually I don't understand this question of yours?
I meant to say, "How did you get your cats to eat rice?" (I have since changed that.)
  #13  
Old 26-Dec-2008, 10:25
RonBee's Avatar
Moderator
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 16,539
Home Country: United States
Native Language: American English
Current Location: United States
Member Type: Other
Default Re: this is my rambling writing about my cats

Quote:
Originally Posted by webdweller View Post
Thank you for your suggestions. Are those all the changes that you think are necessary?

Frankly, I'm somewhat surprised at how little the passage needed to be changed. In writing this passage for review by other people in this forum, I tried to experiment with many new words, phrases, sentence structures and usages that I DEEM appropriate and idiomatic (based on my sense of English) but don't know for sure if in English, they are acceptable or not. They include: "sliding door," "meowed loudly and repeatedly," "a demonstration for food," "put into the fridge for preservation," "shovel the food to both sides to create a "buffer zone" which had no food" (<-- Do you really understand this description?) and "both of them saying in one voice."

Are all the usages above correct and idiomatic?
You didn't need "a demonstration for food" because it would soon be obvious what the cats were hollering for. (Say speak with one voice.) You made some good choices. All in all it's not bad. (Anybody who has lived with a cat will understand it.)

I wouldn't say it's a rambling writing. It's quite coherent.
  #14  
Old 26-Dec-2008, 10:29
RonBee's Avatar
Moderator
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 16,539
Home Country: United States
Native Language: American English
Current Location: United States
Member Type: Other
Default Re: this is my rambling writing about my cats

Quote:
Originally Posted by webdweller View Post
*
PS. I'm currently not sure about "made more and more noise."
That was a good choice. (Anybody who knows cats knows they can be quite noisy.)
  #15  
Old 26-Dec-2008, 10:34
RonBee's Avatar
Moderator
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 16,539
Home Country: United States
Native Language: American English
Current Location: United States
Member Type: Other
Default Re: this is my rambling writing about my cats

Quote:
Originally Posted by webdweller View Post
My final question, do you really fully understand all of my ideas and descriptions in the writing? Is there any word or sentence that is too obscure?
No. Nothing too obscure. It's a nice little story. Anybody can understand it.
Cat: Rowl! Rowl!
Barb: The cat wants inside.
Bob: Okay! I'll let her in.
  #16  
Old 29-Dec-2008, 07:35
Newbie
Threadstarter  
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 8
Member Type: Student or Learner
Default Re: this is my rambling writing about my cats

Thank you very much for your comment Ron Bee. I'm glad you can understand my story.

Wish you all a happy and memorable new year's eve!!!
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
cats, composition, english, essay, writing


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Where to start improving my English writing Callisto Ask a Teacher 5 12-Feb-2010 06:32
[Essay] Check my Essay pls YumzxA1 Editing & Writing Topics 0 05-Dec-2008 06:12
Cats wuwei Ask a Teacher 3 22-May-2008 12:25
editing hashem Editing & Writing Topics 2 15-Jan-2008 00:52
Can someone help editing this little topic for me please! nyim20 Editing & Writing Topics 1 14-Dec-2005 06:52


All times are GMT. The time now is 21:22.



Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.