PLease proofread my essay

[ARUK2008]

Advantages and disadvantages of working and studying

Do you know how many young people work and study? Long time ago there were many young people working and studying. However, there are more now because the economic situation is bad. How many advantages and disadvantages does it have?
Many young people work because they need money to study because their parents don’t have money for pay a university. Furthermore, working represents a learning and professional experience career. Moreover, there are more men working than women.
To work and study at the same time have certain advantages; for example, to get a degree it is good to work because you learn better many things about you field of studies and you have good work experience once your studies are over. And when you don’t have money? One point of view in favor of money is that you can pay the school or university with your salary.
Working and studying have disadvantages. One drawback is that people work all day and don’t have time to study.The most important disadvantage is that at nights, a student is very tired and doesn’t learn very well. Is this good? It is not good, and for this reason most people in the classroom only think about resting and sleeping
To sum up, to work and studyhave many advantages and disadvantages. In my view, when your parents pay your university only is good to work a short time so as to gain professional experience and have more time to devote to study.

[Raymott]

advantages and disadvantages of working and studying

do you know how many young people work and study? a long time ago there were many young people working and studying. However, there are more now because the economic situation is bad. How many advantages and disadvantages does it have?
many young people work because they need money to study because their parents don’t have money for to pay for university fees. Furthermore, working represents a learning and professional experience career. moreover, there are more men working than women. ("moreover" doesn't work here. The new fact doesn't add anything to your argument).
to work and study at the same time have has certain advantages; for example, to get a degree it is good to work because you learn better many things about your field of studies [only if you work in the area of your studies. Most students don't. They study arts and work at macdonalds] and you have good work experience once your studies are over. And when you don’t have money? One point of view in favor of money is that you can pay the school or university with your salary wages. "salary" is normally used for a full-time permanent employee. If someone is payed by the hour, or shift, "wages" is better.
working and studying have has disadvantages.
you are talking about one thing - "working and studying". They are taken together. Otherwise, you mean that working has disadvantages and studying has disadvantages - which they do, but that's not your point.
one drawback is that people work all day and don’t have time to study. the most important disadvantage is that at nights, a student is very tired and doesn’t learn very well. Is this good? It is not good, and for this reason most people in the classroom only think about resting and sleeping
to sum up, to work and study at the same time have has many advantages and disadvantages. In my view, when your parents pay your university fees, it is good to work for only a short time so as to gain professional experience and have more time to devote to study.

r.