Application of Early Modern English

[thedaffodils]

Hello! Some Chinese translators translated some archaic Chinese poets into English. I noticed they applied some words of Early Modern English, eg. thou, thee, thy, hath, into their renditions. But their rendtions are not completely in Early Modern English language but just a few words as I enumerated above. Is the application good or not?

Such translation looks cool to me because the original works are in archaic Chinese expressions, most of which are obsolete today. I think translators just tried to transfer the flavour of old time to its readers. But English is not my mother tongue, I am not able to judge whether they really make sense or not. So I hope to have your opinions on this, especially native speakers' opinions. Many thanks!


PS: I'd offer a translated version as an example to illustrate. The poem as below was translated by a Taiwanese teacher of English. Casting aside from the other linguistic skill of his, I hope to have your opinions about the application of the words, eg. thou, thee, thy, etc.

Thy blessings, great beyond words, may never be repaid;
Thou, pure and holy, have sought truth for countless eons,
In too many lands stayed, two and thirty roles played,
Strived to salvage lost lambs over years of trillions,
Spread worldwide Buddha's thoughts, like water quenching thirst,
Cured our diseases without knowing the lapse of night,
Brought timely aid to those asking thee for help first,
And long been the sole boat crossing the sea of plight.

[Raymott]

Thy blessings, great beyond words, may never be repaid;
Thou, pure and holy, hast sought truth for countless eons,
In too many lands stayed, two and thirty roles played,
Strived to salvage lost lambs over years of trillions,
Spread worldwide Buddha's thoughts, like water quenching thirst,
Cured our diseases without knowing the lapse of night,
Brought timely aid to those asking thee for help first,
And long been the sole boat crossing the sea of plight.

Thou hast sought, strived, spread ...

[susiedqq]

Keep thy words true to the poem so thou can appreciate the words from thee.

[thedaffodils]

Raymott and Susiedqq,

Thank you for your responses.