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Please check my songtext
hey
i'm not sure about my songtext
its the first song of our band and i would like to know if there are any mistakes or weird sentence structures in it, and how you like it, before we start playing it infront of an audience
No Wonder
This scene is versant
it’s all around
the world’s in motion
hectic and loud
everyone’s running
no place to breath
I make may way through
this crowded streets
and suddenly there stands a man in front of me
declaring things of his own philosophy
he actually seems pretty wise and versed to me
but what he says worries me he says
Oh its no wonder that we’re falling apart, no
we’re falling apart
it all falls apart
if things won’t change than the trouble goes on, yes
the trouble goes on
it all will go on
this scene is versant
go look outside
we’ve to come up to
what is desired
stay calm and covered in
pinstripe-suit
the headlines lead while
they keep us mute
and suddenly there stands this man in front of me
one of a few with his own identity
he actually seems pretty wise and versed to me
but what he says worries me he says
Oh its no wonder that we’re falling apart, no
we’re falling apart
it all falls apart
if things won’t change than the trouble goes on, yes
the trouble goes on
it all will go on
Thanks ;)
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Re: Please check my songtext
In songs, even native speakers can use some very strange constructions, so don't worry too much. I have picked out four things to think about.

Originally Posted by
smidty
This scene is versant This means nothing to me
[...]no place to breathe
[...]thisese crowded streets
[...]he actually seems pretty wise and versed to me sounds strange to me, but you'll get away with it in a song.
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Re: Please check my songtext
okey thanks for your reply ;)
I will correct those mistakes
do you have any alternatives for the word "versant" for me?
I thought "versand" means something like familiar
what about "conversant"?
or would it has to be "conversantly" in this case?
maybe you also have a better idea for "versed"?
thank you very much ;)
Last edited by smidty; 10-Jun-2011 at 11:18.
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