an unnatural dialogue

[touchstone]

(Two boys are on the phone)
Jack: Hello, is Mike in?
Mike: Speaking.
Jack: Mike, the school sports meet is coming tomorrow. Let’s go together.
Mike: OK. What shall we take?
Jack: We’ll take our sports clothes and sports shoes
....
(from an English textbook in China)

I don’t think this dialogue is natural.
1. Usually, the person who answers a phone call speaks first. But this one does follow the routine.
2. Jack invites Mike to go to school together tomorrow. I think he should say ‘Let’s go to school together tomorrow.’ People usually say ‘Let’s go together’ when they start to do something.
3. ‘What shall we take?’ is ambiguous. People will misunderstand it as ‘what sports shall we choose.’ Mike should say ‘What should we take with us’.
What do you think of my ideas?
Thanks.

 

[teechar]

(Two boys are on the phone)
Jack: Hello, is Mike in?
Mike: Speaking.
Jack: Hi Mike, it's Jack. The school sports meet is [STRIKE]coming[/STRIKE] on tomorrow. Let’s go together.
Mike: OK. What [STRIKE]shall[/STRIKE] should we take?
Jack: We [STRIKE]’ll[/STRIKE] should take our sports clothes and sports shoes.
(from an English textbook in China)

I don’t think this dialogue is natural.
1. Usually, the person who answers a phone call speaks first. But this one does follow the routine.

That initial "hello" might have been omitted/assumed.

2. Jack invites Mike to go to school together tomorrow. I think he should say ‘Let’s go to school together tomorrow.’

No, that's not necessary.

People usually say ‘Let’s go together’ when they start to do something.
3. ‘What shall we take?’ is ambiguous. People will misunderstand it as ‘what sports shall we choose?’

No.

Mike should say, '

What should we take with us?'

That's possible.

 

[touchstone]

Thank you very much, teechar.
The following is the second half of the dialogue. Would you please have a look?

Mike: Shall I take my camera?
Jack: Good idea! It’ll be fun.
Mike: When shall we meet?
Jack: Let’s make it half past six.
Mike: Where shall we meet?
Jack: At my house.
Mike: OK.See you then.
Jack: See you.

My corrections:
1.Shall I take my camera? ‘Shall’ should be ‘Should’.
2.Good idea! It’ll be fun. ‘It’ should be ‘That’.
3. When shall we meet? ‘Shall’ should be ‘will’ or ‘should’.
4. Let’s make it half past six. An ‘at’ should be put before ‘half past six’.
5. Where shall we meet? ‘Shall’ should be ‘will’ or ‘should’.
6. ‘At my house.’ should be ‘What about my house?’
7. OK. See you then. ‘then’ should be ‘there’.

What do you say?
Thanks a lot.

 

[teechar]

Thank you very much, teechar.
The following is the second half of the dialogue. Would you please have a look?

Mike: Shall I take my camera?
Jack: Good idea! It’ll be fun.
Mike: When shall we meet?
Jack: Let’s make it half past six.
Mike: Where shall we meet?
Jack: At my house.
Mike: OK.See you then.
Jack: See you.

My corrections:
1.Shall I take my camera? ‘Shall’ should be ‘Should’.
Not necessarily.
2.Good idea! It’ll be fun. ‘It’ should be ‘That’.
Not necessarily.
3. When shall we meet? ‘Shall’ should be ‘will’ or ‘should’.
Not necessarily.
4. Let’s make it half past six. An ‘at’ should be put before ‘half past six’.
No, it's better as it is.
5. Where shall we meet? ‘Shall’ should be ‘will’ or ‘should’.
Not necessarily.
6. ‘At my house.’ should be ‘What about my house?’
No, the original is better.
7. OK. See you then. ‘then’ should be ‘there’.
Not necessarily.

Note that "shall" is more a feature of BrE.

 

[touchstone]

Mike: OK. What shall should we take?
Jack: We ’ll should take our sports clothes and sports shoes. (in post #2)

Dear teechar, I wonder if these two corrections are necessary.
Thanks a lot.

 

[emsr2d2]

What should we take? = What do we need to take?
What shall we take? = What are we going to take?

The first makes much more sense because they are going to discuss what they are going to need to take with them. They don't already know.

 

[touchstone]

Jack: Hi Mike, it's Jack. The school sports meet is coming on tomorrow. Let’s go together.

In #2, I wonder why 'coming' is changed to 'on'.

Thanks a lot in advance.

 

[teechar]

meet is coming on tomorrow

That doesn't work in English.

The delivery van is coming tomorrow.
The party/meeting/concert is on tomorrow.

 

[touchstone]

Thanks, teechar.
I read Christmas is coming. I wonder if the reason is that Christmas is a holiday, so people can say that.
Thanks again.

 

[teechar]

I read Christmas is coming.

In the above, "is coming" means "is approaching".
Note that I have edited post #8 to include "meet" in your quote. It is possible to say "is coming on tomorrow" in some contexts. For example,
The new series of Mr Bean is coming on tomorrow.
However, that is to be read as:
The new series of Mr Bean [is coming on] tomorrow.
not as:
The new series of Mr Bean [is coming] on tomorrow.
In the above, "come on" is a phrasal verb meaning to appear on TV.

 

[touchstone]

Thanks very much for your patience and kindness, teechar.
I'm very sorry I made a mistake in post #7. I meant to quote one correction you made in post #2. Because I couldn't use the 'quote' function, I just pasted "The school sports meet is coming on tomorrow." Actually, 'coming' is omitted.
In the OP, the sentence is as follows:
Mike, the school sports meet is coming tomorrow.
And you changed it to: Mike, the school sports meet is on tomorrow.
In fact, I wanted to ask why you changed 'is coming' to ''is on''

Thanks again.

 

[teechar]

For events we organize, we don't typically use "coming"; we might use "coming up."

For example,
The meeting is coming up.
Their engagement party is coming up.

We tend to use "coming" for events that will happen anyway (beyond our control).
Spring is coming.
Christmas is coming.

----------------------------------------------------

For something (an event) already organized and we just want to point this out and/or indicate when it takes (or took) place, we use "on".

The meeting is on tomorrow.
The concert was on last week.
The game will be on next month.