competitive monster?

[alpacinou]

Does the collocation "competitive monster" work?

Is this okay?

On the outside, he appears docile and meek but on the inside, he's a competitive monster. He desperately wants to score the most goals in every game and I think that thirst for success coupled with his otherworldly genius make him a beast.

 

[Barque]

On the outside, he appears docile and meek but on the inside, he's a competitive monster.

Yes, it works.

Yours or did you read it somewhere?

 

[alpacinou]

I wrote it myself.

I'd appreciate it if native speakers also comment on this:

On the outside, he appears docile and meek but on the inside, he's a competitive monster. He desperately wants to score the most goals in every game and I think that thirst for success coupled with his otherworldly genius make him a beast.

 

[Amigos4]

Yes, it works.

I’m not sure about the use of “his otherworldly genius”. What exactly do you mean?

 

[alpacinou]

Yes, it works.

I’m not sure about the use of “his otherworldly genius”. What exactly do you mean?

I mean he has extraordinary talent that seems out of this world.

 

[Amigos4]

I mean he has extraordinary talent that seems out of this world.

Exactly! I don't think "genius" is the right choice for your sentence. I would say, He desperately wants to score the most goals in every game and I think that thirst for success coupled with his otherworldly talent/skill/ability (genius) make him a beast.

 

[tedmc]

I think "otherworldly" implies something spiritual rather than something impressive. It is not the same of "out of this world" which is appropriate for the context.

 

[alpacinou]

I think "otherworldly" implies something spiritual rather than something impressive. It is not the same of "out of this world" which is appropriate for the context.

I think I should agree with you on this.

 

[Tdol]

How about uncanny talent? It seems to hit the mid-ground between the two.