[General] How to fix this sentence?

[thakur_sanjeev]

I see something wrong with the sentence below. I have written this in an article I am currently working on.

There sure is tech savvy crowd among first lot of five hundred who bought <product> without causing big dent in their wallet.


Here five hundred means lot of <products> and not people. How do I rephrase it?

 

[umerislam]

I see something wrong with the sentence below. I have written this in an article I am currently working on.

There sure is tech savvy crowd among the first [STRIKE]lot of[/STRIKE] five hundred who bought <product> without causing big dent in their wallet.


Here five hundred means lot of <products> and not people. How do I rephrase it?

Umer

 

[5jj]

The people who bought the first five hundred without causing a dent in their wallets certainly included a number of tech savvy people. I am not sure about the relevance of the words I have underlined.

 

[thakur_sanjeev]

The people who bought the first five hundred without causing a dent in their wallets certainly included a number of tech savvy people. I am not sure about the relevance of the words I have underlined.

Thanks. "Dent in the wallet" to me means something that did not cost me much. There is no formal idiom like this but I sure this being used (searched in google).

 

[5jj]

I know the expression; it just didn't seem relevant to the sentence as a whole.

 

[Raymott]

I see something wrong with the sentence below. I have written this in an article I am currently working on.

There sure is tech savvy crowd among first lot of five hundred who bought <product> without causing big dent in their wallet.


Here five hundred means lot of <products> and not people. How do I rephrase it?

Just a rephrase to make 500 refer to products and not people:
"There sure is tech savvy among the crowd who bought the first lot of five hundred products without causing a big dent in their wallets."

 

[tedtmc]

Just a rephrase to make 500 refer to products and not people:
"There sure is tech savvy among the crowd who bought the first lot of five hundred products without causing a big dent in their wallets."

Shouldn't there be a 'the' before 'tech savvy'?

 

[Raymott]

Shouldn't there be a 'the' before 'tech savvy'?

No. In English we don't normally use an article before an abstract noun.
"There is technical understanding (tech savvy) among the crowd"

 

[tedtmc]

No. In English we don't normally use an article before an abstract noun.
"There is technical understanding (tech savvy) among the crowd"

Oh, I was thinking about 'the people who are tech savvy' (adjective) - the tech savvy

 

[Raymott]

Oh, I was thinking about 'the people who are tech savvy' (adjective) - the tech savvy

I see. That's right. You could say "The tech savvy were among the crowd who bought ..."
The initial example was not good, so there are a few different understandings you could take from it.

 

[thakur_sanjeev]

Thankyou everyone. This was first query here and now I know who to turn to when in doubt.

 

[thakur_sanjeev]

I know the expression; it just didn't seem relevant to the sentence as a whole.

I will revisit this but there is some contextual information before this line in the article, so it does not look bad as a whole. Thanks.

 

[jadams]

Just a rephrase to make 500 refer to products and not people:
"There sure is tech savvy among the crowd who bought the first lot of five hundred products without causing a big dent in their wallets."

I agrees its about the first 500 products purchased by tech savvy people

 

[Gretchenplay]

Could the problem be with tenses?

There sure is tech savvy crowd among first lot of five hundred who bought <product> without causing big dent in their wallet.

My try:
There sure was the tech savvy crowd who were among the first 500 to buy the product without causing a big dent in their wallets.

or

There sure is the tech savvy crowd who will be among the first 500 to buy the product, without making a dent in their wallets.