I would like to thank

[mrmvp]

Which of the following is correct?

1- I would like to thank the sales' department head Ahmed and his co-workers John and Adam.
2- I would like to thank the sales department, represented by its head Ahmed and his co-workers John and Adam.
3- I would like to thank the sales department, represented by his excellency Ahmed and his co-workers John and Adam.
4- I would like to thank the sales department who represented by his excellency Ahmed and his co-workers John and Adam.
5- I would like to thank the sales department that represented by his excellency Ahmed and his co-workers John and Adam.

Is represented in 2 and 3 reduced adjective clause or reduced relative clause?

Thanks.

 

[Rover_KE]

If Ahmed is entitled to be called 'His Excellency' (click here to see who qualifies for that honorific, which should always be capitalised), he's unlikely to be head of a sales department.

 

[mrmvp]

If Ahmed is entitled to be called 'His Excellency' (click here to see who qualifies for that honorific, which should always be capitalised), he's unlikely to be head of a sales department.

Should I change the word "Excellency" to "head" ?


In Arabic, it is common to name the president of university and dean of college "His Excellency". I agree that in English it is used with high rank diplomats and with princes and kings if I am not mistaken.

 

[emsr2d2]

I would be inclined to keep the Arabic for "His Excellency" and say it (in Arabic) before his name. If there's not a translation that really works when you change it to English, I think it would make sense to leave it as it is.

If I were giving a speech in French (for example), and I needed to introduce a British person called Sir John Smith, I would probably say "Mesdames et messieurs, je vous présente Sir John Smith, du Royaume Uni". I wouldn't try to translate "Sir" into French.