Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

[rodgers white]

Hello there. The following is my attempt at writing a request to a job advertisement, which is used as a possible version for my students. Can you please check it and help me polish it? Many thanks in advance.

Oh, by the way, there are two places underlined below. I write a slash between alternatives for each place. And I want to know — which alternative you think is more natural or better in its place?

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Dear Chris(the Editor-in-chief of our school website)，

I’m writing to apply for the position of Web Editor, advertised on our school website. I feel I am well qualified for the position because I always care a lot about current affairs and take great interest in journalism. Also, I’m good at English. Once I got the first prize in an English Writing Competition in our school. In addition，I worked as a reporter for our school newspaper last year,/I have had one year experience as a reporter with our school newspaper, which will surely help me do the job better.

A position with our school website would give me the opportunity to work part-time in the job that I love.

I would be happy to attend an interview at any time convenient to you.

I look forward to hearing from you. / Thank you for your time.

Yours sincerely，
Li Hua


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Excuse me for my carelessness. I posted it to the wrong place again. Please help me move it to Letter Writing Sub-forum.

 

[teechar]

Hello there. The following is my attempt at writing a job application letter/email, [STRIKE]request to a job advertisement,[/STRIKE] which is used as a possible version for my students. Can you please check it and help me polish it? Many thanks in advance.

Oh, by the way, there are two places underlined below [STRIKE]. I write[/STRIKE] where I've used a slash between alternatives. [STRIKE]for each place. And I want to know —[/STRIKE] Please let me know which alternative you think is more natural or suitable. [STRIKE]better in its place?[/STRIKE]

************************************************** *************************************

Dear Chris, [STRIKE](the Editor-in-chief of our school website)，[/STRIKE]

I’m writing to apply for the position of Web Editor, advertised on our school website. I feel I am well qualified for the position because I [STRIKE]always care a lot about current[/STRIKE] have a genuine and longstanding interest in our school's affairs, and [STRIKE]take great[/STRIKE] I'm very interested in journalism too. Also, I’m [STRIKE]good at[/STRIKE] quite proficient in English. [STRIKE]Once I got the[/STRIKE] I won first prize in an English writing competition in our school last month. In addition，I worked as a reporter for our school newspaper last year,/I have [STRIKE]had[/STRIKE] one year's experience as a reporter with our school newspaper, which I believe will be very useful in this position. [STRIKE]surely help me do the job better.[/STRIKE]

After high school, I plan to study journalism or web publishing, so this part-time role would be ideal for me to get valuable experience in this field.
[STRIKE]A position with our school website would give me the opportunity to work part-time in the job that I love.[/STRIKE]

I would be happy to attend an interview at any time convenient to you.

I look forward to hearing from you. [STRIKE]/ Thank you for your time.[/STRIKE]

Yours sincerely，

Li Hua

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