[Grammar] to excel in vs excelling in

[salvador.dal1950]

Hello. Are this sentences equivalents, incorrect or unnatural in some way?

There is need to show the necessary amount of work that to excel in these professions requires.
There is need to show the necessary amount of work that excelling in these professions requires.

Thank you! :up:

 

[emsr2d2]

I can't work out what you are trying to say.

 

[MikeNewYork]

Hello. Are this sentences equivalents, incorrect or unnatural in some way?

There is need to show the necessary amount of work that to excel in these professions requires.
There is need to show the necessary amount of work that excelling in these professions requires.

Thank you! :up:

My best guess is "You need to work hard to excel in these professions." Your sentences are unclear because they are overly complicated. You are better off writing clearly and simply.

 

[salvador.dal1950]

I'm sorry, I can tell it's complicated.

I wanted to say that there is the necessity to notice that in order to excel in those professions, one must work hard.

Let's see if now it is clearer.

 

[MikeNewYork]

I'm sorry, I can tell it's complicated.

I wanted to say that there is the necessity to notice that in order to excel in those professions, one must work hard.

Let's see if now it is clearer.

That is not much better. Why write complicated sentences? If you are trying to impress someone, these sentences won't do that.

 

[konungursvia]

Which professions can you excel at with little or no work?

 

[salvador.dal1950]

In fact, what I'm trying to say isn't that complicated, is my poor writing skills that muddies everything.

All I want to say is: 1) something has to be brought to our attention. 2) With that thing being: to be good at those profession is necessary to work hard.

 

[MikeNewYork]

In fact, what I'm trying to say isn't that complicated, is my poor writing skills that muddies everything.

All I want to say is: 1) something has to be brought to our attention. 2) With that thing being: to be good at those profession is necessary to work hard.

What is wrong with my suggestion in post #3?

 

[salvador.dal1950]

What is wrong with my suggestion in post #3?

To me it looks perfect but I was told to use personal pronouns as less as possible when writing essays or articles.

Also the part about "being necessary to notice it" was important. The sentence comes from essay that I did so, out of context is true that it doesn't seem relevant.

 

[MikeNewYork]

To me it looks perfect but I was told to use personal pronouns as less as possible when writing essays or articles.

Also the part about "being necessary to notice it" was important. The sentence comes from essay that I did so, out of context is true that it doesn't seem relevant.

If you are stuck on "be necessary to notice", I can't help you.

 

[emsr2d2]

Hello. Are this sentences equivalents, incorrect or unnatural in some way?

There is need to show the necessary amount of work that to excel in these professions requires.
There is need to show the necessary amount of work that excelling in these professions requires.

Thank you! :up:

It is important to (or just "Please") make sure everyone knows how much work it takes to excel in these professions.